Рассказ о двух Стэнах

00:00:04,910 --> 00:00:06,630

I can keep up.

00:00:07,990 --> 00:00:09,570

Whoa!

00:00:09,580 --> 00:00:10,600

Neato!

00:00:10,620 --> 00:00:13,480

Mysterious,

boarded-up cave.

00:00:13,500 --> 00:00:15,560

It might be filled with

lost prehistoric life forms.

00:00:15,580 --> 00:00:17,890

Or Mesoamerican gold.

00:00:17,900 --> 00:00:19,290

Uh, ladies first.

00:00:23,980 --> 00:00:27,160

Ha ha! Good thing you've

got your smarts, Poindexter.

00:00:27,170 --> 00:00:28,720

I've got the other thing.

00:00:28,730 --> 00:00:31,420

What is it called?

Oh, right, punching.

00:00:32,690 --> 00:00:35,320

Cool. Splinters.

00:00:35,330 --> 00:00:37,790

Whoa! It's

so creepy in here.

00:00:37,800 --> 00:00:39,070

Hey, don't worry, bro.

00:00:39,090 --> 00:00:41,220

Wherever we go,

we go together.

00:00:41,240 --> 00:00:43,970

Don't forget to leave

our names so they know

who owns the place.

00:00:46,840 --> 00:00:49,760

Pines, Pines,

Pines, Pines.

00:01:30,160 --> 00:01:33,950

Finally, after all

these long years of waiting,

00:01:33,960 --> 00:01:35,530

you're actually here.

00:01:36,480 --> 00:01:39,350

Brother!

00:01:39,360 --> 00:01:41,780

Ow! What the heck

was that for?

00:01:41,800 --> 00:01:44,380

This was an insanely

risky move,

00:01:44,390 --> 00:01:46,020

restarting the portal.

00:01:46,040 --> 00:01:47,620

Didn't you read

my warnings?

00:01:47,630 --> 00:01:49,180

Warnings, schmarnings.

00:01:49,190 --> 00:01:51,250

How's about maybe

a thanks for saving you

00:01:51,260 --> 00:01:52,410

from what appears to be,

I don't know,

00:01:52,420 --> 00:01:55,290

some kinda sci-fi

sideburn dimension.

00:01:55,300 --> 00:01:57,490

Thank you? You really think

I'm gonna thank you

00:01:57,510 --> 00:01:59,490

after what you did

30 years ago?

00:01:59,500 --> 00:02:00,770

What I did?

00:02:00,780 --> 00:02:02,390

Why, you ungrateful...

00:02:04,410 --> 00:02:06,600

Don't expect me

to go easy on you

00:02:06,610 --> 00:02:09,480

just because

you're family.

00:02:09,500 --> 00:02:10,920

Hey, hi.

Mabel here.

00:02:10,940 --> 00:02:12,360

Quick question.

00:02:12,370 --> 00:02:14,120

What the heck

is going on here?

00:02:14,130 --> 00:02:17,190

Stan, you didn't tell me

there were children down here.

00:02:17,210 --> 00:02:20,030

And some sort of

large, hairless gopher.

00:02:20,040 --> 00:02:21,630

Ha ha, I get that a lot.

00:02:21,640 --> 00:02:23,510

They're your family,

Poindexter.

00:02:23,520 --> 00:02:24,990

Shermy's grandkids.

00:02:25,000 --> 00:02:27,910

I have a niece,

and a nephew?

00:02:27,920 --> 00:02:30,430

Greetings. Do kids

still say greetings?

00:02:30,440 --> 00:02:33,180

I haven't been in

this dimension for

a really long time.

00:02:33,190 --> 00:02:35,230

Whoa, six-fingered

handshake.

00:02:35,240 --> 00:02:37,300

It's a full finger

friendlier than normal.

00:02:37,310 --> 00:02:39,620

Ha ha, I like this kid.

She's weird.

00:02:39,630 --> 00:02:41,700

I... I can't believe it.

00:02:41,710 --> 00:02:44,010

You're the author

of the journals.

00:02:44,020 --> 00:02:45,930

You've read

my journals?

00:02:45,940 --> 00:02:47,770

I haven't just read them.

00:02:47,790 --> 00:02:49,290

I've lived them.

00:02:49,310 --> 00:02:50,970

I've been waiting

for so long to meet you.

00:02:50,990 --> 00:02:53,010

I don't know what to say.

I have so many questions.

00:02:55,310 --> 00:02:57,050

I think I'm gonna

throw up.

00:02:57,060 --> 00:02:58,440

No, no, false alarm.

00:02:58,460 --> 00:03:00,490

Just gotta ride it out.

00:03:00,500 --> 00:03:02,810

Listen, there'll be time

for introductions later.

00:03:02,820 --> 00:03:04,280

But first, tell me, Stan.

00:03:04,290 --> 00:03:06,080

Are there any

security breaches?

00:03:06,090 --> 00:03:08,360

Does anyone else

know about this portal?

00:03:08,370 --> 00:03:09,990

No. Just us.

00:03:10,010 --> 00:03:11,720

Also, maybe the entire

U.S. government.

00:03:11,730 --> 00:03:13,070

The what?!

00:03:13,090 --> 00:03:14,840

Fan out. We're not

going anywhere

00:03:14,850 --> 00:03:17,870

till we find Stan Pines

and those kids.

00:03:17,890 --> 00:03:19,630

Okay. It's all right.

00:03:19,640 --> 00:03:21,870

We've got a while before

they find this room.

00:03:21,880 --> 00:03:24,300

We just need to lay low

and think of a plan.

00:03:24,310 --> 00:03:27,180

It looks like we're

stuck down here for a while.

00:03:27,190 --> 00:03:29,980

Who wants to tell us their

entire mysterious backstory?

00:03:29,990 --> 00:03:33,180

Yes, I have some questions

about all this myself, Stanley.

00:03:33,200 --> 00:03:34,860

Stanley?

00:03:34,870 --> 00:03:36,770

But your name

is Stanford.

00:03:36,790 --> 00:03:38,730

Wait, you took my name?

00:03:38,750 --> 00:03:40,650

What have you been

doing all these years,

you knucklehead?

00:03:40,670 --> 00:03:42,530

Yeah, Grunkle Stan,

no more lies.

00:03:42,540 --> 00:03:44,010

You owe us some answers.

00:03:44,030 --> 00:03:45,410

What's the deal

with this portal?

00:03:45,420 --> 00:03:46,690

Why did you keep

this a secret?

00:03:46,700 --> 00:03:48,770

And what happened

between you and your brother?

00:03:48,790 --> 00:03:51,530

I'm hoping all this aligns

exactly with my fan-fic, Stan.

00:03:51,540 --> 00:03:53,930

If not, I will be

very disappointed.

00:03:53,940 --> 00:03:55,240

Okay. Okay, okay.

00:03:55,260 --> 00:03:56,960

I know I have

a lot of explaining to do.

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It all started

a lifetime ago.

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1960-something.

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Glass Shard Beach,

New Jersey.

00:04:04,210 --> 00:04:06,750

I lived with my ma and pa

in the Lead Paint district

00:04:06,770 --> 00:04:08,040

above the family pawn shop.

00:04:08,050 --> 00:04:09,830

Dad was a strict man.

00:04:09,840 --> 00:04:11,880

Tough as a cinder block,

and not easily impressed.

00:04:11,890 --> 00:04:13,390

I'm not impressed.

00:04:13,400 --> 00:04:15,150

Mom was

a pathological liar,

00:04:15,170 --> 00:04:17,030

which served her well

as a phone psychic.

00:04:17,040 --> 00:04:18,980

That'll be 99 cents

an hour.

00:04:18,990 --> 00:04:20,590

No, you're overpriced.

00:04:20,600 --> 00:04:22,270

Yeah, I predicted

you were gonna hang up.

00:04:22,280 --> 00:04:24,350

And then, there was

my nerdy twin brother Stanford.

00:04:24,360 --> 00:04:26,660

As if his abnormally high

IQ wasn't enough,

00:04:26,680 --> 00:04:28,420

he also had

a rare birth defect...

00:04:28,430 --> 00:04:29,980

six fingers on each hand,

00:04:29,990 --> 00:04:31,450

which might've explained

his obsession

00:04:31,480 --> 00:04:34,330

with sci-fi

mystery weirdness.

00:04:34,340 --> 00:04:37,730

As for me, I had what Mom

liked to call personality.

00:04:37,750 --> 00:04:41,010

But as different

as we were,

00:04:41,020 --> 00:04:42,970

we were the perfect team,

00:04:42,980 --> 00:04:44,570

and every day,

we'd wander the beach,

00:04:44,580 --> 00:04:46,010

looking for adventure.

00:04:46,020 --> 00:04:47,780

Whoa!

00:04:50,900 --> 00:04:52,960

A shipwrecked sailboat.

00:04:52,970 --> 00:04:54,520

Possibly haunted by

pirate ghosts.

00:04:54,540 --> 00:04:56,600

This is the greatest

thing I've ever seen.

00:04:56,610 --> 00:04:58,830

And I once saw

a dead rat floating

in a bucket.

00:04:58,850 --> 00:05:01,520

Ew. What's wrong with you?

00:05:01,530 --> 00:05:04,070

Huh. You know what

this thing's missing?

00:05:04,080 --> 00:05:05,670

Flags.

00:05:05,680 --> 00:05:08,310

Kings of New Jersey,

kings of New Jersey,

00:05:08,320 --> 00:05:10,050

kings of New Jersey!

00:05:12,710 --> 00:05:15,910

I dub thee

theStan O' War.

00:05:15,920 --> 00:05:17,500

Ow! What the heck?

00:05:17,510 --> 00:05:19,460

Well, well, if it ain't

the loser twins.

00:05:19,480 --> 00:05:22,340

Nice boat. You get it

at the dump?

00:05:24,150 --> 00:05:26,580

You would know,

Crampelter. Get lost!

00:05:26,590 --> 00:05:28,250

Listen, dorks,

and listen good.

00:05:28,270 --> 00:05:30,050

You're

a six-fingered freak,

00:05:30,070 --> 00:05:32,850

and you're just

a dumber, sweatier

version of him.

00:05:32,860 --> 00:05:34,530

And you're lucky

you have each other,

00:05:34,550 --> 00:05:36,690

because neither of you

will ever make any friends.

00:05:38,620 --> 00:05:40,540

Dorks

and losers.

00:05:41,980 --> 00:05:44,640

Hey, don't let

those idiots get to you.

00:05:44,660 --> 00:05:46,280

But I am a freak.

00:05:46,290 --> 00:05:48,360

I just wonder if there's

anywhere in the world

00:05:48,370 --> 00:05:50,190

where weirdos like me

fit in.

00:05:50,210 --> 00:05:52,920

Hey, chin up, buddy.

Look.

00:05:52,930 --> 00:05:54,910

One of these days,

you and me are gonna

00:05:54,920 --> 00:05:56,440

sail away from

this dumb town.

00:05:56,450 --> 00:05:58,510

We'll hunt for treasure,

get all the girls,

00:05:58,530 --> 00:06:01,630

and be an unstoppable

team of adventurers.

00:06:01,640 --> 00:06:03,150

You really mean it?

00:06:03,160 --> 00:06:05,050

-High six?

-High six.

00:06:06,440 --> 00:06:07,950

Those were the good times.

00:06:07,960 --> 00:06:09,780

Those bullies may have

been right about us

00:06:09,800 --> 00:06:12,180

not making many friends,

but when push comes to shove,

00:06:12,190 --> 00:06:13,890

you only really need one.

00:06:18,830 --> 00:06:21,180

Ford's brain seemed to get

more impressive every year.

00:06:21,190 --> 00:06:23,340

So did our pet project.

00:06:23,350 --> 00:06:25,890

Sure, I got in more than

my fair share of trouble,

00:06:25,910 --> 00:06:27,690

but when your brother's

the smartest kid in school,

00:06:27,700 --> 00:06:29,550

you've always got a leg up

on the competition.

00:06:31,540 --> 00:06:35,920

The future was looking

bright for both of us,

00:06:35,940 --> 00:06:38,360

till one day.

00:06:38,380 --> 00:06:40,570

Pines twins

to the principal's office.

00:06:40,580 --> 00:06:42,490

Pines twins to

the principal's office.

00:06:42,500 --> 00:06:44,520

Ah, great.

What is it this time?

00:06:44,530 --> 00:06:46,260

Not you. Him.

00:06:53,090 --> 00:06:54,790

Now, Mr. Pines, I'd like to

speak with you

00:06:54,800 --> 00:06:56,310

very frankly,

if I may.

00:06:56,320 --> 00:06:58,710

Very frankly

is the only way I speak.

00:06:58,730 --> 00:07:00,070

You have two sons.

00:07:00,080 --> 00:07:02,060

One of them

is incredibly gifted.

00:07:02,080 --> 00:07:04,060

The other one is standing

outside this room,

and his name's Stanley.

00:07:04,080 --> 00:07:06,100

What are you saying?

00:07:06,110 --> 00:07:08,860

I'm saying your son

Stanford is a genius!

00:07:08,880 --> 00:07:10,700

All of his teachers

are going bananas

00:07:10,710 --> 00:07:12,620

over his science fair

experiment.

00:07:12,630 --> 00:07:14,260

You ever heard of

West Coast Tech?

00:07:14,270 --> 00:07:15,860

Best college

in the country.

00:07:15,870 --> 00:07:17,410

Their graduates turn

science fiction

00:07:17,420 --> 00:07:18,610

into science fact.

00:07:18,630 --> 00:07:20,930

The admissions team

is visiting tomorrow

00:07:20,940 --> 00:07:22,690

to check out

Stanford's experiment.

00:07:22,710 --> 00:07:24,570

Your son may be

a future millionaire, Mr. Pines.

00:07:24,580 --> 00:07:26,850

I'm impressed.

00:07:26,860 --> 00:07:29,290

What about our little

free spirit Stanley?

00:07:29,300 --> 00:07:30,840

That clown?

At this rate,

00:07:30,850 --> 00:07:32,760

he'll be lucky

to graduate high school.

00:07:32,780 --> 00:07:35,560

Look, there's a saltwater

taffy store on the dock,

00:07:35,570 --> 00:07:38,040

and somebody's gotta

get paid to scrape

the barnacles off of it.

00:07:38,060 --> 00:07:41,390

Stanford's going places, but

hey, look on the bright side.

00:07:41,410 --> 00:07:44,440

At least you'll have one son

here in New Jersey forever.

00:07:44,450 --> 00:07:46,190

Joke's on them

if they think

00:07:46,200 --> 00:07:47,790

you wanna go to

some stuffy college

00:07:47,800 --> 00:07:49,310

on the other side

of the country.

00:07:49,330 --> 00:07:51,630

Once we get

theStan O' Warcomplete,

00:07:51,640 --> 00:07:52,940

it's gonna be

beaches, babes,

00:07:52,970 --> 00:07:54,820

and international

treasure hunting for us.

00:07:54,840 --> 00:07:58,030

Look, Stan,

I can't pass up

a chance like this.

00:07:58,040 --> 00:07:59,700

This school has

cutting-edge programs

00:07:59,720 --> 00:08:01,870

and multi-dimensional

paradigm theory.

00:08:01,880 --> 00:08:04,420

Be-boop. I am a nerd robot.

00:08:04,430 --> 00:08:06,260

That's you.

That's what you sound like.

00:08:06,270 --> 00:08:08,250

Ah, well,

00:08:08,270 --> 00:08:11,370

if the college board

isn't impressed with

my experiment tomorrow,

00:08:11,390 --> 00:08:13,330

then okay, I'll do

the treasure hunting thing.

00:08:13,350 --> 00:08:14,770

And if they are?

00:08:14,790 --> 00:08:16,930

Well, then I guess

you better come visit me

00:08:16,950 --> 00:08:19,150

on the other side

of the country.

00:08:21,700 --> 00:08:24,730

Without Ford, I was just

half of a dynamic duo.

00:08:24,740 --> 00:08:27,050

I couldn't make it

out there without him.

00:08:27,060 --> 00:08:28,680

And now, thanks to

that dumb college,

00:08:28,700 --> 00:08:31,300

I was gonna lose

my brother forever.

00:08:35,130 --> 00:08:37,750

This is all your fault,

you dumb machine!

00:08:37,770 --> 00:08:39,890

Oh, no. No, no, no.

What did I do?

00:08:42,000 --> 00:08:44,110

There. All right.

00:08:44,120 --> 00:08:45,700

Good as new.

Probably.

00:08:50,470 --> 00:08:52,380

All right, kid,

show us what you got.

00:08:52,390 --> 00:08:54,340

Okay. Well,

what would you say

00:08:54,360 --> 00:08:56,340

if I told you

the future of technology

00:08:56,360 --> 00:08:58,180

was beneath this sheet?

00:08:58,200 --> 00:09:00,060

I'd say we wasted

a car trip.

00:09:00,070 --> 00:09:01,980

What?

00:09:02,000 --> 00:09:04,300

But it was stable yesterday.

00:09:04,310 --> 00:09:06,180

A fuse must've blown

or something.

00:09:06,190 --> 00:09:08,450

Kid, a perpetual motion

machine has one job...

00:09:08,470 --> 00:09:10,250

to not stop.

00:09:10,260 --> 00:09:12,650

I don't think you're

West Coast Tech material.

00:09:12,660 --> 00:09:14,450

No, wait. Don't go!

00:09:14,460 --> 00:09:16,190

I worked so hard.

00:09:20,620 --> 00:09:22,760

One paddle paddle paddle,

two paddle paddle.

00:09:22,770 --> 00:09:24,640

Man, that Jackie O.

What a fox.

00:09:24,650 --> 00:09:26,200

Hey, what's the word,

sixer?

00:09:26,220 --> 00:09:27,880

Can you explain

what this was doing

00:09:27,900 --> 00:09:29,790

next to my broken

project?

00:09:29,810 --> 00:09:32,430

Okay. I might've

accidentally been...

00:09:32,450 --> 00:09:34,150

horsing around.

00:09:34,170 --> 00:09:35,990

This was no accident, Stan.

You did this.

00:09:36,000 --> 00:09:37,830

You did this because

you couldn't handle me

00:09:37,840 --> 00:09:39,070

going to college

on my own.

00:09:39,080 --> 00:09:40,670

Look, it was a mistake.

00:09:40,680 --> 00:09:42,230

Although, if you

think about it,

00:09:42,240 --> 00:09:43,830

maybe there's

a silver lining.

00:09:43,840 --> 00:09:45,660

Huh? Treasure hunting?

00:09:45,680 --> 00:09:47,230

Are you kidding me?

00:09:47,240 --> 00:09:48,980

Why would I wanna do

anything with the person

00:09:49,000 --> 00:09:51,300

who sabotaged

my entire future?

00:09:51,310 --> 00:09:54,020

You did what,

you knucklehead?

00:09:54,040 --> 00:09:57,410

Stanley, what's

going on in here?

00:09:57,430 --> 00:09:59,380

Wait, no.

I can explain.

It was a mistake.

00:09:59,390 --> 00:10:01,010

You ignoramus.

00:10:01,030 --> 00:10:03,370

Your brother was gonna be

our ticket outta this dump.

00:10:03,390 --> 00:10:05,330

All you ever do

is lie and cheat,

00:10:05,350 --> 00:10:07,530

and ride on

your brother's coattails.

00:10:07,540 --> 00:10:09,640

Well, this time,

you cost our family

00:10:09,660 --> 00:10:11,210

potential millions.

00:10:11,220 --> 00:10:13,130

And until you

make us a fortune,

00:10:13,140 --> 00:10:14,880

you're not welcome

in this household.

00:10:14,890 --> 00:10:17,790

What?! Stanford, tell him

he's being crazy.

00:10:21,490 --> 00:10:23,280

Stanford? Don't

leave me hanging.

00:10:23,300 --> 00:10:25,260

High six?

00:10:27,250 --> 00:10:29,640

Fine! I can make it

on my own.

00:10:29,650 --> 00:10:31,550

I don't need you,

I don't need anyone.

00:10:31,560 --> 00:10:33,110

I'll make millions,

and you'll rue the day

00:10:33,120 --> 00:10:35,470

you turned

your back on me.

00:10:35,480 --> 00:10:37,430

Thanks to one dumb mistake,

I had no brother,

00:10:37,450 --> 00:10:39,550

no home, no nothing.

00:10:39,550 --> 00:10:41,410

But I had a plan

to fix everything.

00:10:44,270 --> 00:10:46,860

Oh, this story's

so sad.

00:10:46,870 --> 00:10:49,660

I know what you two

little broken teacups need.

00:10:49,680 --> 00:10:51,570

To hug it out.

00:10:51,590 --> 00:10:53,450

Hug it out.

00:10:53,470 --> 00:10:56,130

Hug train

comin' in the station.

00:10:56,140 --> 00:10:59,010

Hugapalooza 2000!

00:10:59,020 --> 00:11:00,450

Kid, will you

knock that off?

00:11:00,470 --> 00:11:02,850

I'm trying to tell

my life story here.

00:11:02,860 --> 00:11:05,410

I had decided I wasn't

gonna show my face at home

00:11:05,420 --> 00:11:07,570

till I proved I could

make something of myself.

00:11:07,580 --> 00:11:09,520

Unfortunately,

the treasure hunting business

00:11:09,530 --> 00:11:11,200

was slow going.

00:11:11,210 --> 00:11:14,320

Apparently, gold is

some kind of rare metal.

00:11:14,330 --> 00:11:16,480

Luckily, I struck

another kind of gold.

00:11:16,490 --> 00:11:18,640

In sales.

00:11:18,650 --> 00:11:20,110

Hi there.

I'm Stan Pines

00:11:20,120 --> 00:11:21,590

of Stanco Enterprises.

00:11:21,610 --> 00:11:24,910

Are you sick of this

always happening to you?

00:11:24,920 --> 00:11:27,350

Then you need

the chamois of the future.

00:11:27,370 --> 00:11:29,830

Made with the same material

astronauts use

00:11:29,840 --> 00:11:32,310

to clean up cranberry

stains on the moon.

00:11:32,320 --> 00:11:33,540

That's the Sham Total.

00:11:33,560 --> 00:11:36,180

It's a total sham.

00:11:36,200 --> 00:11:37,860

I had made my mark,

all right.

00:11:37,880 --> 00:11:39,420

Unfortunately,

so did the chamois.

00:11:39,430 --> 00:11:42,020

Apparently, the cheap dye

I used to color them

00:11:42,030 --> 00:11:43,820

only made stains worse.

00:11:43,830 --> 00:11:45,810

Customers weren't

crazy about that.

00:11:45,830 --> 00:11:47,140

Luckily, they were

chasing me

00:11:47,150 --> 00:11:49,000

with Stanco-brand

pitchforks.

00:11:50,150 --> 00:11:51,730

Suckers!

00:11:51,740 --> 00:11:53,850

I was officially banned

from New Jersey.

00:11:53,860 --> 00:11:55,730

But with a quick name change,

00:11:55,740 --> 00:11:57,370

Steve Pinington was ready

to take on Pennsylvania.

00:11:57,380 --> 00:11:59,170

Hi. I'm Steve Pinington.

00:11:59,180 --> 00:12:01,360

Are you sick of bandages

that are hard to remove?

00:12:01,380 --> 00:12:03,040

Then what you need is

the Rip Off.

00:12:03,060 --> 00:12:05,000

The Rip Off won't

give you rashes.

00:12:05,020 --> 00:12:07,120

I repeat, it won't

give you rashes.

00:12:07,140 --> 00:12:09,220

It gave you rashes.

00:12:12,010 --> 00:12:13,830

I traveled

the whole country,

00:12:13,840 --> 00:12:15,200

sometimes

outside of it,

00:12:15,210 --> 00:12:16,990

always one step ahead

of the law,

00:12:17,010 --> 00:12:20,550

looking for something

that would be my big break.

00:12:20,560 --> 00:12:23,710

Whoa. So that explains

all the fake ID's.

00:12:23,730 --> 00:12:25,350

But wait,

what about you?

00:12:25,360 --> 00:12:27,260

Did you end up going

to your dream school?

00:12:27,270 --> 00:12:28,460

Not exactly.

00:12:28,480 --> 00:12:30,140

All right, I know

Backupsmore

00:12:30,150 --> 00:12:32,060

wasn't anyone's

first choice,

00:12:32,080 --> 00:12:33,500

but what we lack in prestige

00:12:33,520 --> 00:12:36,380

we make up for in

mostly bug-free dorms.

00:12:36,400 --> 00:12:38,090

I'm sure your families

are proud.

00:12:38,110 --> 00:12:40,690

More or less.

00:12:40,700 --> 00:12:43,370

In a place like that,

I had to work twice as hard.

00:12:43,390 --> 00:12:45,010

Luckily, that's what

I do best.

00:12:45,030 --> 00:12:46,930

I went from undergrad

to PhD

00:12:46,950 --> 00:12:48,530

three years ahead

of schedule,

00:12:48,540 --> 00:12:50,090

wrote a thesis that was

nationally ranked,

00:12:50,100 --> 00:12:51,730

and was awarded

an enormous grant

00:12:51,750 --> 00:12:53,330

for my own

scientific research.

00:12:53,340 --> 00:12:55,080

But what to study?

00:12:55,090 --> 00:12:56,520

My whole life,

I'd been teased

00:12:56,540 --> 00:12:58,000

for my six fingers.

00:12:58,020 --> 00:13:00,720

But that got me thinking

about anomalies.

00:13:00,730 --> 00:13:03,120

Things that were odd,

unusual,

00:13:03,130 --> 00:13:04,680

statistically improbable.

00:13:04,690 --> 00:13:06,520

And according to

my investigations,

00:13:06,530 --> 00:13:09,360

there was one place with

a higher concentration

00:13:09,370 --> 00:13:11,430

of these things

than anywhere else.

00:13:11,450 --> 00:13:14,510

A small lumber town

in Roadkill County, Oregon.

00:13:14,530 --> 00:13:16,210

Gravity Falls.

00:13:18,520 --> 00:13:20,910

Meanwhile, your old

Uncle Stan was doing great.

00:13:20,920 --> 00:13:22,590

I'd come up with

00:13:22,600 --> 00:13:24,620

a sophisticated new

business strategy.

00:13:24,640 --> 00:13:27,660

Come on. Owl, owl...

00:13:27,670 --> 00:13:29,540

Football player

with an omelet?!

00:13:29,550 --> 00:13:31,330

Gah!

00:13:32,630 --> 00:13:34,860

I was in great shape,

living on my own,

00:13:34,870 --> 00:13:38,080

and the best part was,

I didn't need help from nobody.

00:13:43,740 --> 00:13:45,310

Hello. This is

Stanford Pines.

00:13:47,580 --> 00:13:50,800

I was heading out

on my own, as well.

00:13:50,820 --> 00:13:52,880

I set to work

using my grant money

00:13:52,900 --> 00:13:55,850

to investigate the strange

properties of this town.

00:13:55,860 --> 00:13:57,540

But what would

I find here?

00:14:00,690 --> 00:14:04,150

Bingo. I began

to investigate at once.

00:14:04,160 --> 00:14:07,050

I knew I'd have to record

my findings.

00:14:12,680 --> 00:14:14,740

I began to keep

a journal.

00:14:17,480 --> 00:14:18,910

The journals!

00:14:18,920 --> 00:14:20,820

Sorry, sorry.

00:14:20,840 --> 00:14:23,140

Got excited there

00:14:23,160 --> 00:14:24,940

about the journals.

Keep talking.

00:14:24,950 --> 00:14:27,340

I began to keep

a journal.

00:14:28,870 --> 00:14:30,460

I'm going

to ignore that.

00:14:30,470 --> 00:14:32,540

There were anomalies

everywhere.

00:14:32,550 --> 00:14:34,880

And the more I looked,

the more I saw.

00:14:49,060 --> 00:14:50,240

Fascinating.

00:14:50,260 --> 00:14:52,080

What did you say

your name was?

00:14:52,090 --> 00:14:54,360

Shmebulock... senior.

00:14:54,370 --> 00:14:56,910

It was finally a place

where I felt at home,

00:14:56,920 --> 00:14:59,240

but something

nagged at me.

00:14:59,250 --> 00:15:00,750

Where did it all

come from?

00:15:00,760 --> 00:15:02,070

It seemed to me

the answer must lie

00:15:02,080 --> 00:15:03,670

outside of our world,

00:15:03,690 --> 00:15:06,070

a dimension of weirdness

leaking into ours.

00:15:06,090 --> 00:15:08,420

I realized the only way

to understand Gravity Falls

00:15:08,440 --> 00:15:10,580

would be to build

a gateway, a portal

00:15:10,600 --> 00:15:12,590

to the source of

its weirdness.

00:15:12,600 --> 00:15:14,180

But I couldn't

make it alone.

00:15:14,190 --> 00:15:16,100

I decided to call up

my old college buddy,

00:15:16,110 --> 00:15:17,500

Fiddleford McGucket,

00:15:17,510 --> 00:15:19,380

a young but brilliant

mechanic

00:15:19,390 --> 00:15:20,970

who was wasting his talent

00:15:20,990 --> 00:15:22,500

trying to make

personal computers

00:15:22,510 --> 00:15:23,770

in some garage in

Palo Alto.

00:15:25,630 --> 00:15:26,980

Hello. Fiddleford

Computermajigs.

00:15:26,990 --> 00:15:28,570

You say you're trying

to build

00:15:28,580 --> 00:15:30,490

a trans-universal

poly-dimensional meta vortex?

00:15:30,500 --> 00:15:32,410

Well, that's

mathematically feasible,

00:15:32,420 --> 00:15:34,330

I reckon.

00:15:34,340 --> 00:15:37,480

Many long nights were spent

perfecting the machine.

00:15:37,500 --> 00:15:39,200

It would be

the crowning achievement

00:15:39,220 --> 00:15:41,760

of my studies,

an answer to the source

00:15:41,780 --> 00:15:43,560

of this town's anomalies.

00:15:43,570 --> 00:15:45,390

Get out, get out,

get out!

00:15:47,610 --> 00:15:49,540

The time had come

to test it.

00:15:52,560 --> 00:15:54,470

Ready?

And...

00:15:54,480 --> 00:15:55,780

What?

00:16:00,880 --> 00:16:02,610

I got you, buddy.

00:16:06,720 --> 00:16:09,100

What is it?

Is it working?

00:16:09,120 --> 00:16:10,540

What did you see?

00:16:13,670 --> 00:16:15,020

Fiddleford?

00:16:15,030 --> 00:16:17,020

When Gravity Falls

and earth becomes sky,

00:16:17,030 --> 00:16:19,060

fear the beast

with just one eye.

00:16:19,070 --> 00:16:20,450

Fiddleford, get

a hold of yourself.

00:16:20,470 --> 00:16:22,250

You're not making

any sense.

00:16:22,260 --> 00:16:23,650

This machine

is dangerous.

00:16:23,660 --> 00:16:25,250

You'll bring about

the end of the world with this.

00:16:25,270 --> 00:16:27,090

Destroy it before

it destroys us all!

00:16:27,100 --> 00:16:29,370

I can't destroy this.

It's my life's work.

00:16:29,380 --> 00:16:31,960

I fear we've unleashed

a great danger on the world.

00:16:31,980 --> 00:16:34,760

One I'd just

as soon forget.

I quit.

00:16:34,770 --> 00:16:37,400

Fine. I'll do it

without you.

00:16:37,420 --> 00:16:39,170

I don't need you,

I don't need anyone.

00:16:41,490 --> 00:16:44,830

What? Who said that?

00:16:44,850 --> 00:16:47,080

I was in

over my head,

00:16:47,090 --> 00:16:48,870

and feared I was

losing my sanity.

00:16:48,880 --> 00:16:51,180

I needed help.

Someone I could trust.

00:16:54,880 --> 00:16:55,940

Just give me a few more

days, Rico.

00:16:55,960 --> 00:16:58,610

I'll pay your goons back,

I swear.

00:17:16,790 --> 00:17:19,370

You haven't seen your brother

in over ten years.

00:17:19,390 --> 00:17:21,790

It's okay. He's family.

He won't bite.

00:17:23,380 --> 00:17:26,030

Who is it?

Have you come

to steal my eyes?

00:17:27,460 --> 00:17:28,760

Well, I can always

count on you

00:17:28,780 --> 00:17:30,140

for a warm welcome.

00:17:34,260 --> 00:17:37,600

Stanley, did anyone

follow you, anyone at all?

00:17:37,620 --> 00:17:39,900

Hello to you, too, pal.

00:17:41,530 --> 00:17:43,830

Hey, what is this?

00:17:43,840 --> 00:17:46,390

Sorry. I just had to

make sure you weren't...

00:17:46,400 --> 00:17:47,740

uh, it's nothing.

00:17:47,760 --> 00:17:49,590

Come in, come in.

00:17:49,610 --> 00:17:52,910

Are you gonna explain

what's going on here?

00:17:52,920 --> 00:17:54,860

You're acting like Mom

after her tenth cup of coffee.

00:17:54,880 --> 00:17:56,540

Listen, there

isn't much time.

00:17:56,560 --> 00:17:58,220

I've made huge mistakes,

00:17:58,230 --> 00:17:59,990

and I don't know

who I can trust anymore.

00:18:00,000 --> 00:18:03,020

Hey, easy there.

Let's talk this

through, okay?

00:18:03,030 --> 00:18:05,580

I have something

to show you.

00:18:05,590 --> 00:18:07,420

Something you won't believe.

00:18:07,430 --> 00:18:08,810

I've been around

the world, okay?

00:18:08,830 --> 00:18:12,050

Whatever it is,

I'll understand.

00:18:12,060 --> 00:18:14,690

There is nothing

about this I understand.

00:18:14,700 --> 00:18:16,730

It's a trans-universal

gateway,

00:18:16,740 --> 00:18:19,210

a punched hole through

a weak spot in our dimension.

00:18:19,220 --> 00:18:22,280

I created it to unlock

the mysteries of the universe.

00:18:22,300 --> 00:18:24,040

But it could just as easily

be harnessed

00:18:24,050 --> 00:18:25,920

for terrible destruction.

00:18:25,930 --> 00:18:27,840

That's why I shut it down

and hid my journals

00:18:27,850 --> 00:18:29,480

which explain

how to operate it.

00:18:29,490 --> 00:18:31,200

There's only

one journal left.

00:18:31,210 --> 00:18:35,040

You are the only person

I can trust to take it.

00:18:35,050 --> 00:18:36,590

I have something

to ask of you.

00:18:36,600 --> 00:18:38,640

Remember our plans

to sail around the world

00:18:38,650 --> 00:18:40,470

on a boat?

00:18:40,490 --> 00:18:42,350

Take this book,

get on a boat,

00:18:42,360 --> 00:18:44,430

and sail as far away

as you can.

00:18:44,440 --> 00:18:45,940

To the edge

of the earth.

00:18:45,960 --> 00:18:48,560

Bury it where

no one can find it.

00:18:50,030 --> 00:18:51,660

That's it?

00:18:51,670 --> 00:18:53,860

You finally wanna see me

after ten years,

00:18:53,870 --> 00:18:56,620

and it's to tell me to get as

far away from you as possible?

00:18:56,630 --> 00:18:58,690

Stanley, you don't

understand what I'm up against.

00:18:58,710 --> 00:19:00,500

What I've been through.

00:19:00,510 --> 00:19:02,100

No, no, you don't understand

what I've been through.

00:19:02,110 --> 00:19:04,300

I've been to prison

in three different countries.

00:19:04,310 --> 00:19:06,970

I once had to chew my way

out of the trunk of a car.

00:19:06,980 --> 00:19:08,330

You think you've

got problems?

00:19:08,350 --> 00:19:10,450

I've got

a mullet, Stanford.

00:19:10,470 --> 00:19:12,570

Meanwhile,

where have you been?

00:19:12,590 --> 00:19:14,650

Living it up in

your fancy house

in the woods,

00:19:14,660 --> 00:19:16,680

selfishly hoarding

your college money,

00:19:16,700 --> 00:19:18,360

because you only

care about yourself.

00:19:18,380 --> 00:19:20,400

I'm selfish?

I'm selfish?

00:19:20,410 --> 00:19:22,040

Stanley, how can

you say that

00:19:22,050 --> 00:19:24,160

after costing me

my dream school?

00:19:24,170 --> 00:19:26,600

I'm giving you a chance

to do the first worthwhile

thing in your life,

00:19:26,610 --> 00:19:28,150

and you won't

even listen.

00:19:28,170 --> 00:19:29,680

Well, listen to this.

00:19:29,690 --> 00:19:31,270

You want me to get rid

of this book?

00:19:31,280 --> 00:19:32,950

Fine, I'll get rid of it

right now.

00:19:32,970 --> 00:19:34,150

No! You don't understand.

00:19:34,160 --> 00:19:36,070

You said you wanted

me to have it,

00:19:36,080 --> 00:19:38,010

-so I'll do what

I want with it.

-My research!

00:19:41,360 --> 00:19:42,850

Stanley, give it back.

00:19:44,760 --> 00:19:47,210

You want it back,

you're gonna have to

try harder than that.

00:19:49,510 --> 00:19:51,220

You left me behind,

you jerk.

00:19:51,230 --> 00:19:53,060

It was supposed to be

us forever.

00:19:53,070 --> 00:19:55,600

-You ruined my life.

-You ruined your own life.

00:19:58,990 --> 00:20:00,410

Stanley. Oh, my gosh,

I'm so sorry.

00:20:00,420 --> 00:20:01,800

Are you all right?

00:20:06,780 --> 00:20:08,440

Some brother you

turned out to be.

00:20:08,460 --> 00:20:11,410

You care more about

your dumb mysteries

than your family.

00:20:11,420 --> 00:20:13,480

Then you can have 'em.

00:20:13,490 --> 00:20:15,970

Whoa, whoa, hey.

What's going on?

00:20:15,980 --> 00:20:18,400

-Hey, Stanford...

-Stanley, help me.

00:20:18,410 --> 00:20:20,360

-What do I do?

-Stanley!

00:20:20,370 --> 00:20:22,720

Stanley,

do something!

00:20:27,360 --> 00:20:28,620

Stanford?

00:20:30,530 --> 00:20:32,700

Stanford, come back.

I didn't mean it.

00:20:34,800 --> 00:20:36,500

I just got him back.

00:20:36,510 --> 00:20:38,660

I can't lose him again.

00:20:38,680 --> 00:20:39,750

Come on!

00:20:39,760 --> 00:20:42,260

Stanford!

00:20:42,280 --> 00:20:44,180

I lost him.

00:20:44,190 --> 00:20:46,300

I didn't know

if he was dead or alive

00:20:46,310 --> 00:20:48,010

in some distant galaxy,

00:20:48,030 --> 00:20:49,730

but I knew his journal

must have the answer

00:20:49,750 --> 00:20:51,870

to getting him back...

somehow.

00:20:57,670 --> 00:20:59,590

I didn't get

much sleep that night.

00:21:01,300 --> 00:21:03,560

Or the night

after that.

00:21:03,580 --> 00:21:07,200

I tried for weeks to turn

that dumb machine back on.

00:21:07,210 --> 00:21:08,640

But without

the other two journals,

00:21:08,660 --> 00:21:10,720

it was hopeless.

00:21:10,730 --> 00:21:12,480

Finally,

I ran out of food.

00:21:12,500 --> 00:21:14,890

I had no choice

but to go into town.

00:21:16,800 --> 00:21:19,120

Just the bread then,

stranger?

00:21:19,130 --> 00:21:20,900

That'll be 99 cents.

00:21:23,440 --> 00:21:25,350

Hey, that's no stranger.

00:21:25,360 --> 00:21:27,550

That must be

the mysterious science guy

00:21:27,560 --> 00:21:29,470

that lives in the woods.

00:21:29,480 --> 00:21:31,990

No, no, you got

the wrong guy.

00:21:32,000 --> 00:21:35,020

I've heard strange stories

about that old shack.

00:21:35,030 --> 00:21:38,620

Yeah, mysterious lights

and spooky experiments.

00:21:38,640 --> 00:21:40,660

Gosh, I'd pay anything

00:21:40,670 --> 00:21:43,380

to see what kind of

shenanigans you get

up to in there.

00:21:43,390 --> 00:21:46,010

Me, too.

Do you ever give tours?

00:21:46,020 --> 00:21:48,470

No, really, I...

00:21:51,020 --> 00:21:52,970

Yes, I do give tours.

00:21:52,980 --> 00:21:55,090

Ten... no, no,

15 bucks a person.

00:21:58,780 --> 00:22:00,960

So what did you say

your name was,

00:22:00,980 --> 00:22:02,960

you man of mystery?

00:22:02,980 --> 00:22:04,760

Oh, Stan... ford.

00:22:04,780 --> 00:22:07,500

Stanford Pines.

00:22:09,490 --> 00:22:10,880

Step right up, folks,

00:22:10,890 --> 00:22:13,670

to a world of

enchantment or whatever.

00:22:13,690 --> 00:22:17,150

Behold the nerdy

science box.

00:22:18,210 --> 00:22:20,180

Ah! My eye!

00:22:20,200 --> 00:22:22,910

Uh, I can assure you,

that is in no way permanent.

00:22:22,920 --> 00:22:26,140

I paid $15 for this?

00:22:26,160 --> 00:22:29,860

Uh, you're lucky you weren't

part of the last tour group.

00:22:29,870 --> 00:22:32,580

They never made it

out alive.

00:22:32,590 --> 00:22:34,500

Right?

00:22:37,390 --> 00:22:38,850

Funny.

00:22:38,870 --> 00:22:40,530

So I came up

with a plan.

00:22:40,550 --> 00:22:42,170

I couldn't leave

my brother's house

00:22:42,190 --> 00:22:43,940

until I figured out

how to save him.

00:22:43,950 --> 00:22:45,600

But I needed to pay

his mortgage somehow.

00:22:50,220 --> 00:22:51,840

For once in my life,

00:22:51,860 --> 00:22:53,850

people were actually

buying what I was selling.

00:22:53,860 --> 00:22:55,680

And so,

the Murder Hut was born.

00:22:55,700 --> 00:22:57,520

Later renamed

the Mystery Shack.

00:22:57,530 --> 00:23:00,240

Finally, I'd found

something I was good at.

00:23:00,250 --> 00:23:02,720

For once, being

a liar and a cheat paid off.

00:23:02,730 --> 00:23:05,040

The old me was dead.

00:23:05,050 --> 00:23:07,550

And I faked a car crash

to prove it.

00:23:07,560 --> 00:23:10,810

By day, I was Stanford Pines,

Mr. Mystery.

00:23:12,890 --> 00:23:14,710

But by night, I was

down in the basement,

00:23:14,720 --> 00:23:16,720

trying to bring

the real Stanford back.

00:23:18,440 --> 00:23:20,020

I couldn't risk anyone

learning the truth

00:23:20,030 --> 00:23:21,500

and sabotaging my mission.

00:23:21,520 --> 00:23:23,270

So I lied to everyone.

00:23:23,280 --> 00:23:24,950

The town, my family,

your parents.

00:23:24,960 --> 00:23:26,660

Even you kids.

00:23:26,670 --> 00:23:30,060

So all this time,

you were just trying

to save your brother.

00:23:30,070 --> 00:23:33,010

Grunkle Stan, I'm so sorry

I didn't believe you.

00:23:33,020 --> 00:23:34,410

That's okay, kid.

00:23:34,420 --> 00:23:36,770

I probably wouldn't

have believed me either.

00:23:36,780 --> 00:23:38,450

I heard talking.

It was coming from downstairs.

00:23:38,460 --> 00:23:40,690

We're too late.

The agents are

coming for us.

00:23:40,700 --> 00:23:42,130

What'll we do?

00:23:42,150 --> 00:23:44,520

Oh, man, I was so spellbound

by your dramatic tale,

00:23:44,540 --> 00:23:45,850

I forgot all about

those dudes.

00:23:45,860 --> 00:23:47,880

Wait. Forget.

That's it.

00:23:47,900 --> 00:23:51,880

I think I know a way we might

be able to defeat those agents.

00:23:51,890 --> 00:23:53,440

Of course.

00:23:53,460 --> 00:23:55,000

I don't know how you

got a hold of one of these,

00:23:55,010 --> 00:23:56,880

but this is perfect.

00:23:56,890 --> 00:24:00,060

I can just amplify the signal

to a radio headset frequency.

00:24:01,850 --> 00:24:04,230

There. Now everyone,

plug your ears!

00:24:04,250 --> 00:24:06,310

Get down now!

00:24:06,320 --> 00:24:07,990

Sir, looks like there's

a hidden door

00:24:08,000 --> 00:24:09,390

behind the vending machines.

00:24:09,400 --> 00:24:11,950

Excellent. Get me

Washington on line one.

00:24:11,960 --> 00:24:14,910

I've been practicing making

sounds of excitement for

this very occasion.

00:24:14,920 --> 00:24:16,840

Hey, do you hear that?

00:24:25,780 --> 00:24:28,650

What? Where am I?

00:24:28,660 --> 00:24:32,490

Why am I standing in

some sort of goofy,

fun knick-knack house?

00:24:32,500 --> 00:24:34,290

Stand down, gentlemen.

00:24:34,300 --> 00:24:36,610

I've been sent with the latest

intel from Washington.

00:24:36,620 --> 00:24:38,040

According to this

very real report,

00:24:38,060 --> 00:24:40,090

the power surges

in Gravity Falls

00:24:40,100 --> 00:24:41,690

were actually

due to radiation

00:24:41,700 --> 00:24:43,520

from an unreported

meteor shower.

00:24:43,540 --> 00:24:45,640

A total embarrassment

for your whole department.

00:24:45,650 --> 00:24:47,920

Luckily, I'm here to take

this mess off your hands.

00:24:47,930 --> 00:24:50,200

I'll need all of your

floppy disks,

00:24:50,210 --> 00:24:52,960

and, uh, eight tracks.

Right?

00:24:52,970 --> 00:24:57,560

Uh, everything about

this case is contained

on this drive.

00:24:57,570 --> 00:24:59,920

Well, what are you

waiting for?

A kiss on the cheek?

00:24:59,930 --> 00:25:02,110

Get outta here before

I have your butts

court-martialed.

00:25:02,120 --> 00:25:04,990

Uh, yes, sir.

Apologies, sir.

00:25:05,000 --> 00:25:07,020

False alarm, everyone.

00:25:07,030 --> 00:25:08,960

Whoa.

00:25:18,560 --> 00:25:21,410

Great-uncle Stanford,

that was amazing.

00:25:21,430 --> 00:25:23,460

Let's not go crazy.

It was serviceable.

00:25:23,470 --> 00:25:25,100

Ha ha, thank you, kids.

00:25:25,110 --> 00:25:26,570

But please, call me Ford.

00:25:26,580 --> 00:25:29,090

Sure. Thanks,

great-uncle Ford.

00:25:29,100 --> 00:25:31,010

So, uh, would you mind

if I asked you

00:25:31,020 --> 00:25:32,330

a couple million questions

about Gravity Falls?

00:25:32,340 --> 00:25:34,840

Um, well, I, uh...

00:25:34,850 --> 00:25:36,610

All right, kids,

it's been a long day.

00:25:36,620 --> 00:25:38,680

Me and my brother have

a lot to talk about.

00:25:38,690 --> 00:25:40,600

-Why don't you

hit the hay, huh?

-But it's the author.

00:25:40,610 --> 00:25:42,200

I've been waiting so long

to ask questions about...

00:25:42,210 --> 00:25:45,100

I said, hit the hay!

00:25:47,170 --> 00:25:49,950

I'll just let myself out.

00:25:52,010 --> 00:25:53,910

Wendy, I've got something

amazing to tell you.

00:25:53,920 --> 00:25:55,650

Clear the next

14 hours.

00:25:56,930 --> 00:25:57,940

Look at us.

00:25:57,960 --> 00:25:59,860

When did we become

old men?

00:25:59,880 --> 00:26:01,670

You look like Dad.

00:26:01,680 --> 00:26:04,580

Don't say that.

00:26:04,590 --> 00:26:06,940

Okay, Stanley,

here's the deal.

00:26:06,950 --> 00:26:09,580

You can stay here for the summer

to watch the kids.

00:26:09,590 --> 00:26:11,300

I'll stay down in

the basement

00:26:11,310 --> 00:26:13,210

and try to contain

any remaining damage.

00:26:13,230 --> 00:26:14,780

When the summer's over,

00:26:14,790 --> 00:26:16,290

you give me

my house back,

00:26:16,300 --> 00:26:18,010

you give me

my name back,

00:26:18,020 --> 00:26:19,780

and this Mystery Shack

junk is over forever.

00:26:19,790 --> 00:26:21,490

You got it?

00:26:21,500 --> 00:26:22,910

You really aren't gonna

thank me, are you?

00:26:24,660 --> 00:26:26,640

Fine. On one condition.

00:26:26,660 --> 00:26:28,010

Stay away from the kids.

00:26:28,020 --> 00:26:29,600

I don't want them

in danger.

00:26:29,620 --> 00:26:31,440

'Cause as far as

I'm concerned,

00:26:31,450 --> 00:26:34,340

they're the only family

I have left.

00:26:39,330 --> 00:26:41,240

Did you hear

what they said?

00:26:41,250 --> 00:26:43,030

I think Uncle Ford said

they're gonna buy us

00:26:43,050 --> 00:26:44,910

puppies made of

ice cream.

00:26:44,930 --> 00:26:46,550

Might be wishful

thinking, though.

00:26:46,570 --> 00:26:48,190

I don't know if this

is good or bad.

00:26:48,200 --> 00:26:50,350

I wanted to meet

the author, but...

00:26:50,360 --> 00:26:53,430

Yeah. I liked the way

things were here before.

00:26:53,440 --> 00:26:55,350

Just us and Stan,

00:26:55,360 --> 00:26:57,340

and the occasional

goblin monster.

00:26:57,350 --> 00:26:59,660

I'm sure they'll

work things out.

00:26:59,670 --> 00:27:01,540

Dipper, you don't think

we'll turn out

00:27:01,550 --> 00:27:03,260

like Stan and Ford,

do you?

00:27:03,270 --> 00:27:05,090

What do you mean?

00:27:05,110 --> 00:27:07,890

I mean, they used to be

best friends,

00:27:07,910 --> 00:27:10,380

but then, they got

all stupid.

00:27:10,390 --> 00:27:12,690

Can you promise me

you won't get stupid?

00:27:12,700 --> 00:27:14,610

Not stupider than you,

dum-dum.

00:27:14,620 --> 00:27:17,490

Good night, stupid.

00:27:17,500 --> 00:27:19,270

Good night, stupid.

00:27:23,580 --> 00:27:25,970

Okay, so it turns out

the second Stan,

00:27:25,980 --> 00:27:27,760

the Stan

that we know,

00:27:27,770 --> 00:27:29,330

was actually Stanley,

00:27:29,340 --> 00:27:31,800

but the first Stan

was Stanford,

00:27:31,810 --> 00:27:33,160

but we didn't know

00:27:33,170 --> 00:27:35,030

until Stanford

came out of the portal,

00:27:35,050 --> 00:27:36,670

which was built

by Stanford,

00:27:36,690 --> 00:27:38,920

but then Stanley

pretending to be Stanford,

00:27:38,930 --> 00:27:41,430

he did the portal

'cause he's Stan,

00:27:41,440 --> 00:27:42,550

but he's not Stan.

00:27:42,560 --> 00:27:44,350

Soos, it's 3:00

in the morning.

00:27:44,370 --> 00:27:46,110

Okay, okay,

I understand.

00:27:46,120 --> 00:27:48,180

Anyway, act two,

Stan started...

00:27:48,200 --> 00:27:49,530

Aaaah!

00:00:04,910 --> 00:00:06,630

Ну и догоню!

00:00:07,990 --> 00:00:09,570

Ух ты!

00:00:09,580 --> 00:00:10,600

Круто!

00:00:10,620 --> 00:00:13,480

Закрытая, секретная пещера!

00:00:13,500 --> 00:00:15,560

Там могут быть доисторические животные

00:00:15,580 --> 00:00:17,890

или ацтекское золото!

00:00:17,900 --> 00:00:19,290

Девочки вперед!

00:00:23,980 --> 00:00:27,160

Ха-ха! Ты думаешь, что ты у нас типа

«умный», ботаник!

00:00:27,170 --> 00:00:28,720

А у меня есть другое!

00:00:28,730 --> 00:00:31,420

Как называется? Точняк! Сила!

00:00:32,690 --> 00:00:35,320

Крутяк! Занозы!

00:00:35,330 --> 00:00:37,790

Вот это да! Здесь довольно страшно!

00:00:37,800 --> 00:00:39,070

Спокойно, брат.

00:00:39,090 --> 00:00:41,220

В любое место мы пойдем вместе!

00:00:41,240 --> 00:00:43,970

Напиши наши имена, чтоб все знали,

чья пещера.

00:00:44,000 --> 00:00:46,700

СТЭНЛИ И СТЭНФОРД ПАЙНСЫ

00:00:46,840 --> 00:00:49,760

Пайнсы! Пайнсы! Пайнсы!

00:01:05,984 --> 00:01:09,084

ДИППЕР

00:01:10,208 --> 00:01:11,808

МЭЙБЛ

00:01:12,932 --> 00:01:14,332

СТЭН

00:01:24,656 --> 00:01:26,656

ГРАВИТИ ФОЛЗ

00:01:30,160 --> 00:01:33,950

Наконец! После стольких долгих лет

00:01:33,960 --> 00:01:35,530

ты вернулся сюда!

00:01:36,480 --> 00:01:39,350

Брат мой!

00:01:39,360 --> 00:01:41,780

За что ты мне сейчас врезал?

00:01:41,800 --> 00:01:44,380

Рискованно и абсолютно глупо было

00:01:44,390 --> 00:01:46,020

снова включать портал!

00:01:46,040 --> 00:01:47,620

Ты не читал инструкции?

00:01:47,630 --> 00:01:49,180

Кому они нужны?!

00:01:49,190 --> 00:01:51,250

Лучше бы поблагодарил за то,

что я тебя спас

00:01:51,260 --> 00:01:52,410

из этого, как оно там называется,

00:01:52,420 --> 00:01:55,290

другого измерения.

00:01:55,300 --> 00:01:57,490

Благодарить?! То есть за то,

что ты сделал

00:01:57,510 --> 00:01:59,490

30 лет назад, я должен

сказать «спасибо»?

00:01:59,500 --> 00:02:00,770

Что я сделал?!

00:02:00,780 --> 00:02:02,390

Ах ты, неблагодарный.

00:02:04,410 --> 00:02:06,600

Не жди, что я буду поддаваться

00:02:06,610 --> 00:02:09,480

из-за того, что мы братья.

00:02:09,500 --> 00:02:10,920

Стоп, здрасти! Меня зовут Мэйбл!

00:02:10,940 --> 00:02:12,360

Хочу спросить!

00:02:12,370 --> 00:02:14,120

Что за ерунда здесь происходит?!

00:02:14,130 --> 00:02:17,190

Стэн, почему ты не сказал,

что тут есть дети

00:02:17,210 --> 00:02:20,030

и какой-то большой лысый суслик.

00:02:20,040 --> 00:02:21,630

Мне не привыкать!

00:02:21,640 --> 00:02:23,510

Это наша родня, ботаник –

00:02:23,520 --> 00:02:24,990

внучатые племянники!

00:02:25,000 --> 00:02:27,910

Я... значит, у меня есть внуки?!

00:02:27,920 --> 00:02:30,430

Здраська! Дети еще говорят «здраська»?

00:02:30,440 --> 00:02:33,180

Я очень давно не был в этом измерении.

00:02:33,190 --> 00:02:35,230

Ого! У вас целых шесть пальцев!

00:02:35,240 --> 00:02:37,300

Рукопожатие на целый палец крепче.

00:02:37,310 --> 00:02:39,620

Ха-ха! Ты мне нравишься! Чудачка!

00:02:39,630 --> 00:02:41,700

Я не могу поверить!

00:02:41,710 --> 00:02:44,010

Вы – тот самый автор дневников!

00:02:44,020 --> 00:02:45,930

Ты читал дневники?

00:02:45,940 --> 00:02:47,770

Да я не просто их читал!

00:02:47,790 --> 00:02:49,290

Я их изучал!

00:02:49,310 --> 00:02:50,970

Я давно хотел с вами встретиться.

00:02:50,990 --> 00:02:53,010

Не знаю, что сказать. Столько вопросов.

00:02:54,910 --> 00:02:56,650

Меня сейчас стошнит!

00:02:57,060 --> 00:02:58,440

Нет-нет, пронесло!

00:02:58,460 --> 00:03:00,490

Надо потерпеть!

00:03:00,500 --> 00:03:02,810

Так! Дети, знакомиться мы будем позже!

00:03:02,820 --> 00:03:04,280

Сначала скажи, Стэн:

00:03:04,290 --> 00:03:06,080

ты нигде не засветился?

00:03:06,090 --> 00:03:08,360

Или кто-то ещё знает о портале?

00:03:08,370 --> 00:03:09,990

Только мы знаем!

00:03:10,010 --> 00:03:11,720

Ну, и правительство Соединённых Штатов.

00:03:11,730 --> 00:03:13,070

Кто-кто?!

00:03:13,090 --> 00:03:14,840

Так, бойцы! Всем искать,

00:03:14,850 --> 00:03:17,870

пока не найдете Стэна Пайнса и двух детей!

00:03:17,890 --> 00:03:19,630

Ладно, ничего!

00:03:19,640 --> 00:03:21,870

Какое-то время они нас не найдут!

00:03:21,880 --> 00:03:24,300

Нам нужно затаиться и придумать

хороший план.

00:03:24,310 --> 00:03:27,180

Получается, мы тут надолго застряли!

00:03:27,190 --> 00:03:29,980

Может, расскажете уже вашу

загадочную историю?

00:03:29,990 --> 00:03:33,180

Да, у меня, кстати, тоже накопились

вопросы, Стэнли.

00:03:33,200 --> 00:03:34,860

Стэнли?

00:03:34,870 --> 00:03:36,770

Но тебя же зовут Стэнфорд!

00:03:36,790 --> 00:03:38,730

Ты присвоил моё имя?

00:03:38,750 --> 00:03:40,650

Ты чем тут вообще занимался, глупец?

00:03:40,670 --> 00:03:42,530

Да, дядя Стэн, хватит уже врать!

00:03:42,540 --> 00:03:44,010

Нам нужны ответы!

00:03:44,030 --> 00:03:45,410

Откуда здесь взялся портал?

00:03:45,420 --> 00:03:46,690

И почему ты это скрывал?

00:03:46,700 --> 00:03:48,770

И что за история вышла у тебя с братом?

00:03:48,790 --> 00:03:51,530

Надеюсь, она полностью совпадет

с моим фанфиком!

00:03:51,540 --> 00:03:53,930

Если нет, я буду разочарован.

00:03:53,940 --> 00:03:55,240

Ладно-ладно-ладно!

00:03:55,260 --> 00:03:56,960

Сейчас я вам всё объясню!

00:03:56,980 --> 00:03:59,480

История началась лет 50 назад!

00:03:59,490 --> 00:04:01,720

В 60-е.

00:04:01,730 --> 00:04:04,200

На «Пляже битых стекол» в Нью-Джерси!

00:04:04,210 --> 00:04:06,750

У родителей был небольшой ломбард.

00:04:06,770 --> 00:04:08,040

Мы жили прямо над ним.

00:04:08,050 --> 00:04:09,830

Отец был человеком жестким,

00:04:09,840 --> 00:04:11,880

его сложно было впечатлить.

00:04:11,890 --> 00:04:13,390

Я не впечатлен.

00:04:13,400 --> 00:04:15,150

Мать – патологическая врунья,

00:04:15,170 --> 00:04:17,030

подрабатывала телефонным оракулом.

00:04:17,040 --> 00:04:18,980

Да, 99 центов в час!

00:04:18,990 --> 00:04:20,590

У самих высокие цены!

00:04:20,600 --> 00:04:22,270

Я предвидела, что вы откажетесь!

00:04:22,280 --> 00:04:24,350

А еще у меня был ботаник брат-близнец,

Стэнфорд.

00:04:24,360 --> 00:04:26,660

Он был невыносимо умен,

00:04:26,680 --> 00:04:28,420

и у него был генетический дефект:

00:04:28,430 --> 00:04:29,980

шесть пальцев на каждой руке,

00:04:29,990 --> 00:04:31,450

что объясняло его одержимость

00:04:31,480 --> 00:04:34,330

научной фантастикой!

00:04:34,340 --> 00:04:37,730

Ну а я, как говорила мама, у меня

был характер.

00:04:37,750 --> 00:04:41,010

Но хоть мы были разными,

00:04:41,020 --> 00:04:42,970

мы были командой.

00:04:42,980 --> 00:04:44,570

И каждый день мы исследовали пляж

00:04:44,580 --> 00:04:46,010

в поисках приключений.

00:04:47,020 --> 00:04:48,280

Ого!

00:04:50,900 --> 00:04:52,960

Обломки кораблекрушения!

00:04:52,970 --> 00:04:54,520

А что если там – призраки пиратов?!

00:04:54,540 --> 00:04:56,600

Ничего круче я не видел!

00:04:56,610 --> 00:04:58,830

А я видел дохлую крысу в помойном ведре.

00:04:58,850 --> 00:05:01,520

Фу! Нашел, с чем сравнивать!

00:05:01,530 --> 00:05:04,070

Хмм. Знаешь, чего тут не хватает?

00:05:04,080 --> 00:05:05,370

Флага!

00:05:05,680 --> 00:05:08,310

Короли Нью-Джерси! Короли Нью-Джерси!

00:05:08,320 --> 00:05:10,050

Короли Нью-Джерси!

00:05:12,710 --> 00:05:15,910

Нарекаю тебя «Боевой Стэн»!

00:05:15,920 --> 00:05:17,500

Ау! Это что такое?

00:05:17,510 --> 00:05:19,460

Так-так, это же братья-неудачники!

00:05:19,480 --> 00:05:22,340

Что за хлам?! Нашли в помойке?

00:05:24,150 --> 00:05:26,580

Тебе виднее, Крэмпелтер. Иди отсюда!

00:05:26,590 --> 00:05:28,250

Вот что я скажу, неудачники!

00:05:28,270 --> 00:05:30,050

Ты – урод с шестью пальцами,

00:05:30,070 --> 00:05:32,850

а ты – его копия только сильнее воняешь!

00:05:32,860 --> 00:05:34,530

Вам повезло, что вас двое,

00:05:34,550 --> 00:05:36,690

потому что с вами никто не будет дружить!

00:05:38,620 --> 00:05:40,540

Полные неудачники!

00:05:41,980 --> 00:05:44,640

Брат! Не обращай внимания на идиотов.

00:05:44,660 --> 00:05:46,280

Но я ведь правда урод!

00:05:46,290 --> 00:05:48,360

Интересно, есть ли в мире место,

00:05:48,370 --> 00:05:50,190

где людей, вроде меня, не дразнят?

00:05:50,210 --> 00:05:52,920

Ну же! Не вешай нос! Слушай!

00:05:52,930 --> 00:05:54,910

Однажды мы с тобой уплывем

00:05:54,920 --> 00:05:56,440

из этого тупого городишки!

00:05:56,450 --> 00:05:58,510

Найдем сокровища, разных красоток,

00:05:58,530 --> 00:06:01,630

и у нас будет куча потрясных приключений.

00:06:01,640 --> 00:06:03,150

Ты это серьёзно?

00:06:03,160 --> 00:06:05,050

-Дай шесть.

-Держи шесть!

00:06:06,440 --> 00:06:07,950

Старые добрые времена.

00:06:07,960 --> 00:06:09,780

С друзьями у нас, и правда,

00:06:09,800 --> 00:06:12,180

была напряженка, но друга хватит и одного,

00:06:12,190 --> 00:06:13,890

если он настоящий!

00:06:18,830 --> 00:06:21,180

С каждым годом Форд становился всё умнее,

00:06:21,190 --> 00:06:23,340

а наша мечта всё реальнее!

00:06:23,350 --> 00:06:25,890

У меня с учебой было не очень,

00:06:25,910 --> 00:06:27,690

но когда твой брат – самый умный в школе,

00:06:27,700 --> 00:06:29,550

это даёт некоторые преимущества.

00:06:29,550 --> 00:06:30,600

НАУЧНАЯ ВЫСТАВКА В НЬЮ-ДЖЕРСИ!

00:06:30,600 --> 00:06:31,540

ВЕЧНЫЙ ДВИГАТЕЛЬ

00:06:31,540 --> 00:06:35,920

Казалось, что у нас всё идёт лучше некуда!

00:06:35,940 --> 00:06:38,360

И вдруг однажды...

00:06:38,380 --> 00:06:40,370

Близнецы Пайнс – к директору!

00:06:40,580 --> 00:06:42,490

Близнецы Пайнс – к директору!

00:06:42,500 --> 00:06:44,520

Отлично, что ещё случилось?

00:06:44,530 --> 00:06:46,260

Ты подожди! Он!

00:06:53,090 --> 00:06:54,790

Что ж, мистер Пайнс, вы позволите говорить

00:06:54,800 --> 00:06:56,310

с вами откровенно?

00:06:56,320 --> 00:06:58,710

Я со всеми только так разговариваю.

00:06:58,730 --> 00:07:00,070

У вас близнецы!

00:07:00,080 --> 00:07:02,060

Один – невероятно одаренный,

00:07:02,080 --> 00:07:04,060

другой – сидит в коридоре,

и его зовут Стэнли.

00:07:04,080 --> 00:07:06,100

Я не понимаю!

00:07:06,110 --> 00:07:08,860

Я сказал, что ваш сын Стэнфорд – гений!

00:07:08,880 --> 00:07:10,700

Все учителя просто в восторге

00:07:10,710 --> 00:07:12,620

от его научного проекта!

00:07:12,630 --> 00:07:14,260

Вот: Западный Технологический!

00:07:14,270 --> 00:07:15,860

Лучший университет в стране.

00:07:15,870 --> 00:07:17,410

Его выпускники претворяют фантастику

00:07:17,420 --> 00:07:18,610

в жизнь!

00:07:18,630 --> 00:07:20,930

Завтра его представители

00:07:20,940 --> 00:07:22,690

приедут посмотреть проект Стэнфорда!

00:07:22,710 --> 00:07:24,570

Ваш сын может стать миллионером,

мистер Пайнс.

00:07:24,580 --> 00:07:26,850

Я впечатлен.

00:07:26,860 --> 00:07:29,290

А как же наш свободолюбивый Стэнли?

00:07:29,300 --> 00:07:30,840

Этот клоун? Повезет,

00:07:30,850 --> 00:07:32,760

если он, вообще, закончит школу!

00:07:32,780 --> 00:07:35,560

Знаете, в порту есть много разных

заведений,

00:07:35,570 --> 00:07:38,040

кто-то же должен мыть там иногда полы!

00:07:38,060 --> 00:07:41,390

Стэнфорд уедет учиться!

Но зато один ваш сын

00:07:41,410 --> 00:07:44,440

всегда будет оставаться с вами

здесь, в Нью-Джерси.

00:07:44,450 --> 00:07:46,190

Ха! Они думают,

00:07:46,200 --> 00:07:47,790

что ты поедешь учиться

00:07:47,800 --> 00:07:49,310

в какой-то дурацкий университет!

00:07:49,330 --> 00:07:51,630

Вот закончим «Боевого Стэна»

00:07:51,640 --> 00:07:52,940

и нас ждут красотки

00:07:52,970 --> 00:07:54,820

и поиски затонувших сокровищ!

00:07:54,840 --> 00:07:58,030

Знаешь, Стэн, я не могу упустить

такой шанс!

00:07:58,040 --> 00:07:59,700

У них сильная программа

00:07:59,720 --> 00:08:01,870

по интересующей меня теории

мультиизмерений!

00:08:01,880 --> 00:08:04,420

Бип-буп, я – робот-ботаник!

00:08:04,430 --> 00:08:06,260

Это ты! Ты так говоришь.

00:08:06,270 --> 00:08:08,250

Ладно!

00:08:08,270 --> 00:08:11,370

Если завтра их не впечатлит мой проект

на научной выставке,

00:08:11,390 --> 00:08:13,330

тогда вперёд, на поиск сокровищ!

00:08:13,350 --> 00:08:14,770

А если впечатлит?

00:08:14,790 --> 00:08:16,930

Ну, тогда приедешь ко мне в гости

00:08:16,950 --> 00:08:19,150

в дурацкий университет.

00:08:21,700 --> 00:08:24,730

Без Форда я был бесполезной

половиной дуэта.

00:08:24,740 --> 00:08:27,050

Я не мог достроить корабль.

00:08:27,060 --> 00:08:28,680

А из-за этого университета

00:08:28,700 --> 00:08:31,300

я мог потерять брата навсегда!

00:08:33,430 --> 00:08:36,050

Всё из-за тебя, дурацкая машина!

00:08:37,770 --> 00:08:39,890

О нет! Нет, нет! Что я наделал?!

00:08:42,000 --> 00:08:44,110

Вот! Нормально!

00:08:44,120 --> 00:08:45,700

Работает! Наверное!

00:08:50,470 --> 00:08:52,380

Так, мальчик, показывай проект.

00:08:52,390 --> 00:08:54,340

Конечно! Да! Представьте,

00:08:54,360 --> 00:08:56,340

что за этой тканью находится

00:08:56,360 --> 00:08:58,180

будущее всех технологий!

00:08:58,200 --> 00:09:00,060

Думаю, мы зря приехали.

00:09:00,070 --> 00:09:01,980

Что?!

00:09:02,000 --> 00:09:04,300

Но ещё вчера всё работала!

00:09:04,310 --> 00:09:06,180

Наверное, сгорел какой-то предохранитель!

00:09:06,190 --> 00:09:08,450

Вечный двигатель хорош тем,

00:09:08,470 --> 00:09:10,250

что не останавливается! Никогда!

00:09:10,260 --> 00:09:12,650

Ты не подходишь нашему университету.

00:09:12,660 --> 00:09:14,450

Стойте! Подождите!

00:09:14,460 --> 00:09:16,190

Я же столько работал!

00:09:20,620 --> 00:09:22,760

Раз, два, три, четыре, пять, шесть, семь!

00:09:22,770 --> 00:09:24,640

Джеки Онасис – красотка!

00:09:24,650 --> 00:09:26,200

Эй, как дела, шестопал?

00:09:26,220 --> 00:09:27,880

Как этот пакет оказался рядом

00:09:27,900 --> 00:09:29,790

с моим сломанным проектом?

00:09:29,810 --> 00:09:32,430

Спокойно! Ну, я проходил мимо и

00:09:32,450 --> 00:09:34,150

как бы, нечаянно...

00:09:34,170 --> 00:09:35,990

Это было не нечаянно! Нарочно!

00:09:36,000 --> 00:09:37,830

Ты нарочно сломал, чтобы я

00:09:37,840 --> 00:09:39,070

не уехал в университет!

00:09:39,080 --> 00:09:40,670

Говорю же, нечаянно!

00:09:40,680 --> 00:09:42,230

Хотя, если подумать,

00:09:42,240 --> 00:09:43,830

может, это к лучшему?

00:09:43,840 --> 00:09:45,660

А? Поиски сокровищ?

00:09:45,680 --> 00:09:47,230

Ты что, издеваешься?!

00:09:47,240 --> 00:09:48,980

Ты, правда, думаешь, что я отправлюсь

в путешествие

00:09:49,000 --> 00:09:51,300

с тем, кто загубил моё будущее?

00:09:51,310 --> 00:09:54,020

Что-что ты натворил, Стэн?

00:09:54,040 --> 00:09:57,410

Стэнли, что тут у вас происходит?

00:09:57,430 --> 00:09:59,380

Подожди, пап, я всё объясню, я не нарочно!

00:09:59,390 --> 00:10:01,010

Ты – глупец, Стэн!

00:10:01,030 --> 00:10:03,370

Твой брат мог вытащить нас из этой дыры!

00:10:03,390 --> 00:10:05,330

Ты всю жизнь только врал

00:10:05,350 --> 00:10:07,530

и списывал у брата!

00:10:07,540 --> 00:10:09,640

А теперь фактически украл у своей семьи

00:10:09,660 --> 00:10:11,210

миллионы!

00:10:11,220 --> 00:10:13,130

Пока не вернешь эти деньги,

00:10:13,140 --> 00:10:14,880

чтобы глаза мои тебя не видели!

00:10:14,890 --> 00:10:17,790

Что?! Стэнфорд, скажи, что это бред!

00:10:21,490 --> 00:10:23,280

Стэнфорд? Не бросай меня!

00:10:23,300 --> 00:10:25,260

Шестопал!

00:10:27,250 --> 00:10:29,640

Ладно! Я и без вас справлюсь!

00:10:29,650 --> 00:10:31,550

Подумаешь! Мне никто не нужен!

00:10:31,560 --> 00:10:33,110

Я заработаю миллионы, и вы пожалеете,

00:10:33,120 --> 00:10:35,470

что выгнали меня!

00:10:35,480 --> 00:10:37,430

Из-за роковой случайности я лишился

00:10:37,450 --> 00:10:39,550

семьи и дома!

00:10:39,550 --> 00:10:41,410

Но я знал, как всё исправить.

00:10:44,270 --> 00:10:46,860

Ах! Какая грустная история!

00:10:46,870 --> 00:10:49,660

А я знаю, что вам обоим нужно

прямо сейчас!

00:10:49,680 --> 00:10:51,570

Обнимашечки!

00:10:51,590 --> 00:10:53,450

Обнимашки!

00:10:53,470 --> 00:10:56,130

Поезд объятий подходит к станции!

00:10:56,140 --> 00:10:59,010

Суперобнимашки-2000!

00:10:59,020 --> 00:11:00,450

Прекрати сейчас же!

00:11:00,470 --> 00:11:02,850

Я пытаюсь рассказать вам свою историю!

00:11:02,860 --> 00:11:05,410

И я решил, что не вернусь,

00:11:05,420 --> 00:11:07,570

пока не докажу себе и им,

что я чего-то стою в жизни.

00:11:07,580 --> 00:11:09,520

К сожалению, с поиском сокровищ дело шло

00:11:09,530 --> 00:11:11,200

не очень!

00:11:11,210 --> 00:11:14,320

Видимо, золото и правда редкий металл!

00:11:14,330 --> 00:11:16,480

Но я нашел золотую жилу...

00:11:16,490 --> 00:11:18,640

в сфере продаж!

00:11:18,650 --> 00:11:20,110

Привет, я – Стэн Пайнс

00:11:20,120 --> 00:11:21,590

из «Стэн-Ко Энтерпрайзиз»!

00:11:21,610 --> 00:11:24,910

Надоело, что с вами это происходит?

00:11:24,920 --> 00:11:27,350

Тогда покупайте «Странную тряпку»!

00:11:27,370 --> 00:11:29,830

Именно такими тряпками астронавты

00:11:29,840 --> 00:11:32,310

оттирают пятна сока на Луне!

00:11:32,320 --> 00:11:33,540

Ничего странного!

00:11:33,560 --> 00:11:36,180

Это же «Странные тряпки»!

00:11:36,200 --> 00:11:37,860

Я оставил след в этом бизнесе!

00:11:37,880 --> 00:11:39,420

К сожалению, мой товар – тоже.

00:11:39,430 --> 00:11:42,020

Дешевая краска, которой я красил тряпки,

00:11:42,030 --> 00:11:43,820

усугубляла пятна!

00:11:43,830 --> 00:11:45,810

Покупателям это не понравилось.

00:11:45,830 --> 00:11:47,140

К счастью, гоняли они меня

00:11:47,150 --> 00:11:49,000

вилами от компании «Стэн-Ко».

00:11:50,150 --> 00:11:51,730

Выкусите!

00:11:51,740 --> 00:11:53,850

Мне запретили въезд в Нью-Джерси.

00:11:53,860 --> 00:11:55,730

Но я слегка изменил имя

00:11:55,740 --> 00:11:57,370

и отправился в Пенсильванию!

00:11:57,380 --> 00:11:59,170

Привет, я – Стив Пайнингтон!

00:11:59,180 --> 00:12:01,360

Устали от несрывающихся пластырей?

00:12:01,380 --> 00:12:03,040

Тогда покупайте «Оторву»!

00:12:03,060 --> 00:12:05,000

Оторвется безболезненно, гарантирую,

00:12:05,020 --> 00:12:07,120

больно никому не будет!

00:12:07,140 --> 00:12:08,220

БОЛЬНО НЕ БУДЕТ!

00:12:08,220 --> 00:12:09,220

Больно было.

00:12:12,010 --> 00:12:13,830

Я объехал всю страну

00:12:13,840 --> 00:12:15,200

и некоторые прилегающие!

00:12:15,210 --> 00:12:16,990

Всегда был на шаг впереди закона

00:12:17,010 --> 00:12:20,550

и в поисках своей золотой жилы!

00:12:20,560 --> 00:12:23,710

Ясно! Вот, откуда те поддельные документы.

00:12:23,730 --> 00:12:25,350

Погодите, а как же вы?

00:12:25,360 --> 00:12:27,260

Вы поступили в университет мечты?

00:12:27,270 --> 00:12:28,460

Ну, не совсем.

00:12:28,480 --> 00:12:30,140

Знаю, вы не сразу выбрали

00:12:30,150 --> 00:12:32,060

Университет Дырарвард,

00:12:32,080 --> 00:12:33,500

но нашу непрестижность

00:12:33,520 --> 00:12:36,380

мы компенсируем почти отсутствием

клопов в общаге!

00:12:36,400 --> 00:12:38,090

Уверен, ваши родители это оценят!

00:12:38,110 --> 00:12:40,690

Так или иначе.

00:12:40,700 --> 00:12:43,370

В этом университете пришлось

работать вдвое усерднее.

00:12:43,390 --> 00:12:45,010

К счастью, это я умел.

00:12:45,030 --> 00:12:46,930

Докторскую защитил

00:12:46,950 --> 00:12:48,530

на три года раньше,

00:12:48,540 --> 00:12:50,090

она получила национальное признание,

00:12:50,100 --> 00:12:51,730

и мне дали огромный грант

00:12:51,750 --> 00:12:53,330

на научные исследования!

00:12:53,340 --> 00:12:55,080

Но что исследовать?

00:12:55,090 --> 00:12:56,520

Всю жизнь меня дразнили

00:12:56,540 --> 00:12:58,000

за шестипалость,

00:12:58,020 --> 00:13:00,720

и тогда я задумался об аномалиях!

00:13:00,730 --> 00:13:03,120

О вещах странных, необычных,

00:13:03,130 --> 00:13:04,680

статистически невероятных.

00:13:04,690 --> 00:13:06,520

Мои исследования показали,

00:13:06,530 --> 00:13:09,360

что было место, где концентрация

подобных аномалий

00:13:09,370 --> 00:13:11,430

была выше, чем где бы то ни было еще!

00:13:11,450 --> 00:13:14,510

Городок лесорубов в Бездорожном

округе штата Орегон –

00:13:14,530 --> 00:13:16,210

Гравити Фолз.

00:13:16,210 --> 00:13:18,000

ШТАТЫ, В КОТОРЫЕ МНЕ ЗАПРЕЩЁН ВЪЕЗД

00:13:18,520 --> 00:13:20,910

Тем временем, ваш дядя Стэн

жил не тужил.

00:13:20,920 --> 00:13:22,590

Придумал новую

00:13:22,600 --> 00:13:23,620

потрясную бизнес-стратегию.

00:13:23,620 --> 00:13:24,640

СОТРИ И ВЫИГРАЙ!

00:13:24,640 --> 00:13:27,660

Ну же! Сова, сова,

00:13:27,670 --> 00:13:29,140

футболист с омлетом?!

00:13:29,150 --> 00:13:30,230

Чёрт!

00:13:32,630 --> 00:13:34,860

Всё было супер! Я был сам себе хозяин,

00:13:34,870 --> 00:13:38,080

и главное – мне не нужна была помощь.

00:13:43,740 --> 00:13:45,310

Стэнфорд Пайнс слушает.

00:13:47,580 --> 00:13:48,800

Я тоже путешествовал один.

00:13:48,800 --> 00:13:50,200

ГРАВИТИ ФОЛЗ

«ТУТ НЕ НА ЧТО СМОТРЕТЬ»

00:13:50,820 --> 00:13:52,880

На деньги от гранта я решил

00:13:52,900 --> 00:13:55,850

исследовать странности этого городка.

00:13:55,860 --> 00:13:57,540

Что же я тут обнаружу?

00:14:00,690 --> 00:14:04,150

Вот оно! Я сразу начал работу!

00:14:04,160 --> 00:14:07,050

Научные данные надо фиксировать!

00:14:12,680 --> 00:14:14,740

Я начал вести дневник.

00:14:16,880 --> 00:14:18,310

Дневники!

00:14:18,920 --> 00:14:20,820

Это, извините, просто...

00:14:20,840 --> 00:14:23,140

я обрадовался

00:14:23,160 --> 00:14:24,940

из-за дневников! Вы продолжайте!

00:14:24,950 --> 00:14:27,340

Итак, я начал вести дневник.

00:14:28,870 --> 00:14:30,460

Не буду обращать внимания!

00:14:30,470 --> 00:14:32,540

Аномалии были везде!

00:14:32,550 --> 00:14:34,880

И чем больше я искал, тем больше их было.

00:14:35,000 --> 00:14:36,200

ЛЕТУЧИЕ ГЛАЗЫШИ

00:14:46,500 --> 00:14:48,000

ПАРЯЩАЯ СКАЛА! В ПРИРОДЕ НЕ БЫВАЕТ!

00:14:49,060 --> 00:14:50,240

Замечательно!

00:14:50,260 --> 00:14:52,080

Как, говорите, вас зовут?

00:14:52,090 --> 00:14:54,360

Шмебьюлок! Старший.

00:14:54,370 --> 00:14:56,910

Здесь я впервые почувствовал себя дома.

00:14:56,920 --> 00:14:59,240

Но что-то не давало мне покоя.

00:14:59,250 --> 00:15:00,750

Откуда всё это здесь?

00:15:00,760 --> 00:15:02,070

Казалось, ответ лежит

00:15:02,080 --> 00:15:03,670

за пределами нашего мира.

00:15:03,690 --> 00:15:06,070

В другом измерении, просочившемся в наше!

00:15:06,090 --> 00:15:08,420

Я решил, что понять аномалии Гравити Фолз

00:15:08,440 --> 00:15:10,580

можно, лишь построив портал,

00:15:10,600 --> 00:15:12,590

ведущий к источнику этих аномалий.

00:15:12,600 --> 00:15:14,180

Но один я не мог его создать!

00:15:14,190 --> 00:15:16,100

И я пригласил моего однокурсника,

00:15:16,110 --> 00:15:17,500

Фидлфорда МакГакета,

00:15:17,510 --> 00:15:19,380

молодого, гениального механика,

00:15:19,390 --> 00:15:20,970

прожигавшего свой талант

00:15:20,990 --> 00:15:22,500

в попытках создать персональный компьютер

00:15:22,510 --> 00:15:23,770

в гараже в Пало Альто.

00:15:25,630 --> 00:15:26,980

Алло? Фидлфорд Компьютер-мэджикс!

00:15:26,990 --> 00:15:28,570

Построить межгалактический

00:15:28,580 --> 00:15:30,490

мультиизмеренческий метапортал?

00:15:30,500 --> 00:15:32,410

С точки зрения математики – можно,

00:15:32,420 --> 00:15:34,330

мне кажется!

00:15:34,340 --> 00:15:37,480

Много бессонных ночей ушло на постройку!

00:15:37,500 --> 00:15:39,200

Портал должен был стать

00:15:39,220 --> 00:15:41,760

моим главным достижением в поиске

источника

00:15:41,780 --> 00:15:43,560

городских аномалий.

00:15:43,570 --> 00:15:45,390

Давай, давай, давай!

00:15:47,610 --> 00:15:49,540

Пришел час его испытать!

00:15:52,560 --> 00:15:54,470

Готов? И...

00:15:54,480 --> 00:15:55,780

Нет!

00:16:00,880 --> 00:16:02,610

Я тебя держу!

00:16:06,720 --> 00:16:09,100

Что там? Получилось?

00:16:09,120 --> 00:16:10,540

Что ты там видел?

00:16:13,670 --> 00:16:15,020

Фидлфорд?

00:16:15,030 --> 00:16:17,020

Когда в Гравити небом станет земля,

00:16:17,030 --> 00:16:19,060

бойся одноглазого зверья.

00:16:19,070 --> 00:16:20,450

Фидлфорд, приди в себя!

00:16:20,470 --> 00:16:22,250

Я не понимаю ни слова!

00:16:22,260 --> 00:16:23,650

Эта машина опасна!

00:16:23,660 --> 00:16:25,250

Из-за неё наступит конец света!

00:16:25,270 --> 00:16:27,090

Её нужно немедленно уничтожить!

00:16:27,100 --> 00:16:29,370

Нет, я не могу! Это работа всей жизни!

00:16:29,380 --> 00:16:31,960

Мы подвергли наш мир огромной опасности!

00:16:31,980 --> 00:16:34,760

Но какой именно, я забыл! Я ухожу!

00:16:34,770 --> 00:16:37,400

Иди! И без тебя справлюсь!

00:16:37,420 --> 00:16:39,170

Ну, и подумаешь!

Мне никто не нужен!

00:16:41,490 --> 00:16:44,830

Что? Кто это сказал?

00:16:44,850 --> 00:16:47,080

Я совсем потерял покой

00:16:47,090 --> 00:16:48,870

и боялся потерять разум.

00:16:48,880 --> 00:16:51,180

Мне нужен был кто-то,

кому я мог доверять.

00:16:51,180 --> 00:16:52,380

«СТЭН-КО»

НАМ МОЖНО ДОВЕРЯТЬ!

00:16:54,180 --> 00:16:55,940

Дай мне еще пару дней, Рико!

00:16:55,960 --> 00:16:58,610

Я всё тебе заплачу, обещаю!

00:17:04,000 --> 00:17:05,000

ГРАВИТИ ФОЛЗ

00:17:05,000 --> 00:17:06,800

ПОЖАЛУЙСТА, ПРИЕЗЖАЙ. ФОРД

00:17:16,790 --> 00:17:19,370

Ты не видел его больше 10 лет!

00:17:19,390 --> 00:17:21,790

И что?! Он же брат! Он не укусит.

00:17:23,380 --> 00:17:26,030

Кто там? Ты пришёл украсть мои глаза?

00:17:27,460 --> 00:17:28,760

Я не сомневался, что приём

00:17:28,780 --> 00:17:30,140

будет теплым.

00:17:34,260 --> 00:17:37,600

Стэнли, за тобой не было хвоста?

Ты не заметил?

00:17:37,620 --> 00:17:39,900

И тебе «здравствуй», братишка!

00:17:41,530 --> 00:17:43,830

А! Хорош! Да что происходит?!

00:17:43,840 --> 00:17:46,390

Прости, просто хотел проверить,

что ты не...

00:17:46,400 --> 00:17:47,740

ничего!

00:17:47,760 --> 00:17:49,590

Входи, входи.

00:17:49,610 --> 00:17:52,910

Ты мне объяснишь, что происходит?

00:17:52,920 --> 00:17:54,860

Ты, как мама после 10 чашек кофе.

00:17:54,880 --> 00:17:56,540

Стэнли, времени мало!

00:17:56,560 --> 00:17:58,220

Я совершил ошибку

00:17:58,230 --> 00:17:59,990

и уже не знаю, кому могу доверять.

00:18:00,000 --> 00:18:03,020

Слышь, успокойся! Давай поговорим об этом!

00:18:03,030 --> 00:18:05,580

Лучше я кое-что покажу!

00:18:05,590 --> 00:18:07,420

Но ты глазам не поверишь!

00:18:07,430 --> 00:18:08,810

Братишка, я весь мир объехал!

00:18:08,830 --> 00:18:12,050

Я что угодно смогу понять!

00:18:12,060 --> 00:18:14,690

Знаешь, чё-то я ничего не могу понять!

00:18:14,700 --> 00:18:16,730

Межизмеренческий портал!

00:18:16,740 --> 00:18:19,210

Это дыра в слабой точке нашего измерения!

00:18:19,220 --> 00:18:22,280

Я создал его, чтобы раскрыть

тайны вселенной!

00:18:22,300 --> 00:18:24,040

Но портал можно использовать во зло

00:18:24,050 --> 00:18:25,920

и разрушить весь наш мир!

00:18:25,930 --> 00:18:27,840

Я его отключил, а принцип работы

00:18:27,850 --> 00:18:29,480

зашифровал в дневниках!

00:18:29,490 --> 00:18:31,200

Остальные я спрятал,

00:18:31,210 --> 00:18:35,040

а этот могу доверить единственному

человеку!

00:18:35,050 --> 00:18:36,590

И я тебя кое о чём попрошу!

00:18:36,600 --> 00:18:38,640

Помнишь наши планы, о путешествии

00:18:38,650 --> 00:18:40,470

под парусом?

00:18:40,490 --> 00:18:42,350

Возьми книгу, выйди в море

00:18:42,360 --> 00:18:44,430

и уплыви как можно дальше!

00:18:44,440 --> 00:18:45,940

На край света!

00:18:45,960 --> 00:18:48,560

И спрячь там, где никто не найдет!

00:18:50,030 --> 00:18:51,660

И это всё?!

00:18:51,670 --> 00:18:53,860

Впервые за 10 лет ты вспомнил о брате,

00:18:53,870 --> 00:18:56,620

и лишь для того, чтобы я уплыл от тебя

как можно дальше?!

00:18:56,630 --> 00:18:58,690

Ты не понимаешь, с чем я столкнулся!

00:18:58,710 --> 00:19:00,500

Через что я прошел!

00:19:00,510 --> 00:19:02,100

Это ты не понимаешь, через что я прошел!

00:19:02,110 --> 00:19:04,300

Я отсидел в тюрьме в трех странах!

00:19:04,310 --> 00:19:06,970

Я несколько раз сбегал из багажника

машины!

00:19:06,980 --> 00:19:08,330

Думаешь, у тебя проблемы?!

00:19:08,350 --> 00:19:10,450

У меня стрижка-маллет, Стэнфорд!

00:19:10,470 --> 00:19:12,570

А где ты был всё это время?

00:19:12,590 --> 00:19:14,650

Жил припеваючи в своей лачуге в лесу

00:19:14,660 --> 00:19:16,680

и, как эгоист, прожигал свой грант,

00:19:16,700 --> 00:19:18,360

потому что думаешь только о себе!

00:19:18,380 --> 00:19:20,400

Я эгоист?! Я эгоист?!

00:19:20,410 --> 00:19:22,040

Стэнли?! Как ты можешь так говорить?

00:19:22,050 --> 00:19:24,160

Это ты погубил мою мечту!

00:19:24,170 --> 00:19:26,600

Я даю тебе шанс хоть что-то сделать

для людей,

00:19:26,610 --> 00:19:28,150

а ты даже не слушаешь!

00:19:28,170 --> 00:19:29,680

Лучше ты послушай!

00:19:29,690 --> 00:19:31,270

Избавиться от дневника?

00:19:31,280 --> 00:19:32,950

Ладно! Сейчас я его спалю!

00:19:32,970 --> 00:19:34,150

Нет! Ты не понимаешь!

00:19:34,160 --> 00:19:36,070

Ах! Ты сам мне его отдал,

00:19:36,080 --> 00:19:38,010

-и я сделаю с ним, что захочу!

-Исследования!

00:19:41,360 --> 00:19:42,850

Стэнли, верни дневник!

00:19:44,760 --> 00:19:47,210

Хочешь дневник? Так попробуй

его у меня отнять!

00:19:49,510 --> 00:19:51,220

Ты меня бросил, предатель!

00:19:51,230 --> 00:19:53,060

Мы были не разлей вода!

00:19:53,070 --> 00:19:55,600

-Ты мне всю жизнь сломал!

-Нет, ты сам её сломал!

00:19:58,990 --> 00:20:00,410

Стэнли! О, господи, прости!

00:20:00,420 --> 00:20:01,800

Как ты себя...

00:20:06,780 --> 00:20:08,440

Вот, значит, как ты со своим братом!

00:20:08,460 --> 00:20:11,410

Какие-то секреты важнее родной крови?

00:20:11,420 --> 00:20:13,480

Ну, и сиди с ними!

00:20:13,490 --> 00:20:15,970

Стой, стой! Нет! Что происходит?

00:20:15,980 --> 00:20:18,400

-Эй, Стэнфорд!

-Стэнли, помоги!

00:20:18,410 --> 00:20:20,360

-Как я тебе помогу?

-Стэнли!

00:20:20,370 --> 00:20:22,720

Стэнли! Помоги мне!

00:20:27,360 --> 00:20:28,620

Стэнфорд?

00:20:30,530 --> 00:20:32,700

Стэнфорд, вернись! Я же не хотел!

00:20:34,800 --> 00:20:36,500

Я едва его нашел!

00:20:36,510 --> 00:20:38,660

Я не могу его потерять!

00:20:38,680 --> 00:20:39,750

Давай же!

00:20:39,760 --> 00:20:42,260

Стэнфорд!

00:20:42,280 --> 00:20:44,180

Я его потерял.

00:20:44,190 --> 00:20:46,300

Я не знал, жив ли он

00:20:46,310 --> 00:20:48,010

в другом измерении,

00:20:48,030 --> 00:20:49,730

но я знал, что в дневнике написано,

00:20:49,750 --> 00:20:51,870

как его вернуть.

00:20:57,670 --> 00:20:59,590

В ту ночь я совсем не спал!

00:21:01,300 --> 00:21:03,560

И в следующую – тоже!

00:21:03,580 --> 00:21:07,200

Я много недель пытался снова

запустить эту штуку,

00:21:07,210 --> 00:21:08,640

но без двух других дневников

00:21:08,660 --> 00:21:10,720

всё было тщетно!

00:21:10,730 --> 00:21:12,480

Потом у меня кончилась еда,

00:21:12,500 --> 00:21:14,890

и мне пришлось идти в город.

00:21:16,800 --> 00:21:19,120

Берете только хлеб, незнакомец?

00:21:19,130 --> 00:21:20,900

99 центов.

00:21:23,440 --> 00:21:25,350

Нет, он не незнакомец!

00:21:25,360 --> 00:21:27,550

Это тот таинственный ученый,

00:21:27,560 --> 00:21:29,470

который поселился в лесу!

00:21:29,480 --> 00:21:31,990

Нет-нет, я не он, вы ошибаетесь.

00:21:32,000 --> 00:21:35,020

Я слышал странные истории о его хижине.

00:21:35,030 --> 00:21:38,620

Да! Таинственный свет и странные

эксперименты!

00:21:38,640 --> 00:21:40,660

Боже, я бы много отдал за то,

00:21:40,670 --> 00:21:43,380

чтобы посмотреть, чем это вы там

занимаетесь!

00:21:43,390 --> 00:21:46,010

Ой, я тоже! А вы не проводите экскурсий?

00:21:46,020 --> 00:21:48,470

Серьёзно, я не тот...

00:21:51,020 --> 00:21:52,970

Да! Провожу экскурсии!

00:21:52,980 --> 00:21:55,090

10... нет-нет, билеты по 15

баксов!

00:21:58,780 --> 00:22:00,960

Так это, как вы сказали, вас зовут,

00:22:00,980 --> 00:22:02,960

таинственный мужчина?

00:22:02,980 --> 00:22:04,760

Зовут Стэн... форд!

00:22:04,780 --> 00:22:07,500

Стэнфорд Пайнс!

00:22:09,490 --> 00:22:10,880

Прошу, заходите

00:22:10,890 --> 00:22:13,670

в мир загадок и чудес!

00:22:13,690 --> 00:22:17,150

Узрите! Это странная ботанская штука!

00:22:18,210 --> 00:22:20,180

Мой глаз!

00:22:20,200 --> 00:22:22,910

Уверяю вас, это очень скоро

пройдёт!

00:22:22,920 --> 00:22:26,140

И я за это отдала 15 баксов?

00:22:26,160 --> 00:22:29,860

Повезло, что не попали на прошлую

экскурсию.

00:22:29,870 --> 00:22:32,580

Они вообще не ушли живыми!

00:22:32,590 --> 00:22:34,500

Классно?

00:22:37,390 --> 00:22:38,850

Ну, ты юморист!

00:22:38,870 --> 00:22:40,530

И тогда у меня созрел план.

00:22:40,550 --> 00:22:42,170

Я не мог покинуть хижину,

00:22:42,190 --> 00:22:43,940

пока не спасу брата,

00:22:43,950 --> 00:22:45,600

но ипотеку за неё мне нужно было платить!

00:22:50,220 --> 00:22:51,840

И у меня впервые

00:22:51,860 --> 00:22:53,850

покупали то, что я продавал!

00:22:53,860 --> 00:22:55,680

Так появилась «Лачуга страха»!

00:22:55,700 --> 00:22:57,520

Позже переименованная в «Хижину чудес».

00:22:57,530 --> 00:23:00,240

Я, наконец, нашел себя.

00:23:00,250 --> 00:23:02,720

Моя любовь к вранью была востребована!

00:23:02,730 --> 00:23:05,040

Прежний я умер!

00:23:05,050 --> 00:23:07,550

А подстроенная авария это подтвердила.

00:23:07,560 --> 00:23:10,810

Днем я был Стэнфорд Пайнс,

человек-загадка!

00:23:12,890 --> 00:23:14,710

А ночью я спускался в подвал

00:23:14,720 --> 00:23:16,720

и пытался вернуть настоящего Стэнфорда!

00:23:18,440 --> 00:23:20,020

Чтобы мне не помешали, никто не должен был

00:23:20,030 --> 00:23:21,500

ничего узнать!

00:23:21,520 --> 00:23:23,270

Поэтому я врал всем:

00:23:23,280 --> 00:23:24,950

соседям, близким, родственникам,

00:23:24,960 --> 00:23:26,660

даже вам, дети.

00:23:26,670 --> 00:23:30,060

Получается, что все эти годы ты пытался

спасти брата!

00:23:30,070 --> 00:23:33,010

Дядя Стэн, прости, что я тебе не поверил.

00:23:33,020 --> 00:23:34,410

Ничего, малыш!

00:23:34,420 --> 00:23:36,770

Я бы и сам себе не поверил.

00:23:36,780 --> 00:23:38,450

Я слышу голоса! Звук идет снизу!

00:23:38,460 --> 00:23:40,690

Сейчас здесь будут правительственные

агенты!

00:23:40,700 --> 00:23:42,130

Что мы делать будем?

00:23:42,150 --> 00:23:44,520

Надо же, я был так поглощен вашим

рассказом,

00:23:44,540 --> 00:23:45,850

что совсем забыл об этих чуваках!

00:23:45,860 --> 00:23:47,880

Постой! «Забыл»?! Точно!

00:23:47,900 --> 00:23:51,880

Кажется, я знаю, как можно одолеть

этих агентов!

00:23:51,890 --> 00:23:53,440

Верно!

00:23:53,460 --> 00:23:55,000

Не знаю, как ты это достал,

00:23:55,010 --> 00:23:56,880

но это решение!

00:23:56,890 --> 00:24:00,060

Нужно только передать сигнал на частоте

их раций...

00:24:01,850 --> 00:24:04,230

Есть! Теперь все заткните уши!

00:24:04,250 --> 00:24:06,310

Пригнитесь! Быстро!

00:24:06,320 --> 00:24:07,990

Сэр! Похоже, за автоматом

00:24:08,000 --> 00:24:09,390

есть скрытая дверь!

00:24:09,400 --> 00:24:11,950

Отлично! Соедини меня с Вашингтоном!

00:24:11,960 --> 00:24:14,910

Специально на этот случай я тренировался

радостно кричать!

00:24:14,920 --> 00:24:16,840

Триггер, ты это слышишь?

00:24:25,780 --> 00:24:28,650

Что?! А где это я?

00:24:28,660 --> 00:24:32,490

И почему я рядом с каким-то глупым

сувенирным магазином?

00:24:32,500 --> 00:24:34,290

Не вставайте!

00:24:34,300 --> 00:24:36,610

Я к вам с донесением из Вашингтона!

00:24:36,620 --> 00:24:38,040

Согласно этому достоверному отчёту,

00:24:38,060 --> 00:24:40,090

всплески энергии в Гравити Фолз

00:24:40,100 --> 00:24:41,690

произошли из-за радиации,

00:24:41,700 --> 00:24:43,520

вызванной метеоритным дождем!

00:24:43,540 --> 00:24:45,640

Стыд и позор всему вашему отделу!

00:24:45,650 --> 00:24:47,920

К счастью для вас, я всё за вами подчищу!

00:24:47,930 --> 00:24:50,200

Передайте мне все дискеты

00:24:50,210 --> 00:24:52,960

и... кассеты! Да?

00:24:52,970 --> 00:24:57,560

Но всё, что связано с делом, хранится

на этой флешке.

00:24:57,570 --> 00:24:59,920

Ждете прощального поцелуя?

00:24:59,930 --> 00:25:02,110

Убирайтесь, пока не отдал вас

под трибунал!

00:25:02,120 --> 00:25:04,990

Да, сэр! Извините нас, сэр!

00:25:05,000 --> 00:25:07,020

Ложная тревога, бойцы!

00:25:18,560 --> 00:25:21,410

Дедушка Стэнфорд, это было круто!

00:25:21,430 --> 00:25:23,460

Не сходите с ума. Это было неплохо.

00:25:23,470 --> 00:25:25,100

Ха-ха! Спасибо, дети,

00:25:25,110 --> 00:25:26,570

но зовите меня Форд.

00:25:26,580 --> 00:25:29,090

Ладно! Спасибо, дядя Форд!

00:25:29,100 --> 00:25:31,010

Слушай, а ты не против, если я задам тебе

00:25:31,020 --> 00:25:32,330

парочку миллионов вопросов?

00:25:32,340 --> 00:25:34,840

Знаешь, ну я...

00:25:34,850 --> 00:25:36,610

Так, дети, сегодня выдался тяжелый день,

00:25:36,620 --> 00:25:38,680

и нам с братом надо поговорить!

00:25:38,690 --> 00:25:40,600

-Давайте-ка в постель.

-Но это автор!

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Я столько ждал, чтобы расспросить

его про...

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Я сказал – живо в постель!

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Я, пожалуй, тоже пока пойду!

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Венди, я должен тебе кое-что рассказать.

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Это часов на 15.

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Ты смотри!

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И когда это мы состарились?

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Ты похож на отца.

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Ох, ну и комплимент!

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Ладно, Стэнли, давай так:

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до конца лета присмотри за детьми,

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а я постараюсь устранить

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все повреждения в подвале!

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Но к осени

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ты вернёшь мне мой дом,

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вернёшь моё имя,

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и весь этот туристический обман

закончится!

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Ты понял?

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Ты мне даже «спасибо» не скажешь?

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Ладно. Одно условие!

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Детей не впутывай!

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Не смей ими рисковать!

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Потому что, насколько я понял,

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другой родни, кроме них, у меня нет.

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Слышал, что они сказали?

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По-моему, дядя Форд сказал, что они

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купят нам мороженое!

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Хотя, может, мне и послышалось.

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Даже не знаю, хорошо это или плохо!

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Я так хотел найти автора, но...

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Да. Мне нравилось, как тут всё было

раньше!

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Только мы и Стэн,

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и порой какой-нибудь заблудший монстр.

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Я думаю, они помирятся.

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Диппер, когда мы вырастем,

мы не станем такими,

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как Стэн и Форд?

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Что? В каком смысле?

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Ну, в смысле, ведь в детстве они

были не разлей вода,

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а потом поглупели!

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Ты можешь пообещать, что ты не поглупеешь?

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Ну, уж глупее тебя точно не буду.

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Спокойной ночи, дурачок.

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Спокойной ночи, дурочка.

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Короче, и оказалось, что второй Стэн,

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тот Стэн, которого мы знали,

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на самом деле был Стэнли.

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А первый Стэн был Стэнфордом,

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но мы его не знали,

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пока этот Стэнфорд не вышел из портала,

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который этот Стэнфорд и построил когда-то.

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Но этот Стэнли, который выдавал себя

за Стэнфорда,

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починил портал, потому что он и есть Стэн,

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но он – не Стэн.

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Зус, слышь, сейчас три часа ночи.

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Ладно-ладно, я понял!

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Часть вторая! Стэн начал...